How to Be a Power Connector Summary

"Your network is your net worth." This book shows how upgrading from a simple networker to a power connector can transform your personal and professional life.

1. Build Relationships Strategically

Networking is more than just meeting people; it’s about creating valuable relationships. Strategic relationships provide mutual value—through money, information, or connections—and help everyone involved achieve more.

These relationships elevate your social status and identity. For example, being known as someone close to a high-profile individual like Mark Zuckerberg can influence how others perceive you. A strong network can also grant you faster access to valuable information and resources, helping goals become more attainable.

To assess your network's strength, ask yourself: Are you regularly adding value to the conversations you have? Do you have a "wish list" of people to connect with? If not, these questions can guide the process of strengthening your network.

Examples

• Think of celebrities whose careers changed after meeting influential producers or managers.
• Business professionals often seek mentorship from industry leaders to grow.
• A sports team's performance may hinge on strategic relationships with high-profile sponsors.

2. Categorize Your Connections Using the 5+50+100 Rule

To effectively organize your network, categorize your relationships into three distinct groups: Top 5, Key 50, and Vital 100. These categories help focus your energy on nurturing the most valuable and impactful ties.

The Top 5 are your closest allies, such as a spouse, best friend, or business partner, with whom you communicate regularly. The Key 50 represents friends and associates you interact with frequently. Lastly, the Vital 100 consists of acquaintances who are still willing to lend a hand when needed.

By understanding these levels, you can prioritize who deserves immediate attention, who might require a check-in, and who should remain in your extended network.

Examples

• Entrepreneurs often rely on business partners in their Top 5 to make critical decisions.
• Career-focused individuals may touch base with their Key 50 weekly for updates and advice.
• A high school friend reconnecting for a favor fits into the Vital 100.

3. Diversify Your Network for Creativity and Innovation

While it may feel comfortable to connect with like-minded people, diversity in relationships fosters fresh ideas and innovation. A wide range of contacts from different backgrounds expands your perspective.

A wide network includes varied industries, generations, or cultures. A deep network ensures multiple routes to achieve specific goals, while a robust network is responsive—people are eager to help when approached. A diverse network offers unique solutions you might not have considered on your own.

Examples

• Mixing Baby Boomers and Millennials in a focus group can generate groundbreaking ideas.
• Collaboration between artists and scientists often leads to innovative solutions.
• A Catholic and Buddhist working together might find common ground in unexpected areas.

4. Find the Right Ecosystem for Your Goals

To thrive, you need to position yourself in the ideal environment—or ecosystem—for your professional or personal aspirations. High-energy hubs with influential players tend to bring opportunities closer to you.

Identify where your field’s key players and resources congregate and aim to belong. If your ecosystem involves writing, align with publishing communities. Before diving in, research your fit within this ecosystem and polish your image to match its expectations.

Examples

• Authors often move to publishing hubs like New York or London.
• Tech innovators tend to flock to Silicon Valley to access venture capital.
• Local charity work opens doors to influential community leaders.

5. Preparation and Targeting are Key

Power connecting starts with preparation and precise targeting. Knowing where you stand and pinpointing the right people to engage sets the foundation for meaningful connections.

Begin by listing your achievements and categorizing them into ecosystems like business, education, or hobbies. Then rank your existing contacts using the 5+50+100 rule. Target someone who aligns with your goals and prepare for a thoughtful first impression.

Examples

• An aspiring chef making a list of food-industry icons to meet at culinary events.
• An MBA graduate categorizing classmates into future startup collaborators.
• Dressing sharply and complimenting someone’s watch at a conference—an easy icebreaker.

6. Follow Up and Make Everyone a Winner

Building a connection doesn’t end after the first meeting. Immediate follow-up solidifies relationships. Add value by sharing something useful, like relevant news or information related to their interests.

The ultimate goal is making introductions within your network to create value for all parties. Power connectors thrive on these “power triangles” where everybody benefits.

Examples

• Sending a thoughtful email 24 hours after a first meeting to acknowledge the conversation.
• Introducing a budding entrepreneur to a potential investor in your network.
• Helping a software developer find speaking opportunities at a tech event.

7. Use Social Media Intelligently

Platforms like LinkedIn, Twitter, and emails are powerful tools for connecting. But effective use of social media involves building trust, providing context, and being selective about whom you connect with.

Email subject lines should immediately explain your purpose when reaching out. Twitter enables interaction with industry experts through likes, retweets, and thoughtful replies. Social media deepens ties and expands networks beyond physical boundaries.

Examples

• A subject line like “We spoke at XYZ event: Here’s that article on crypto” encourages engagement.
• Following an author on Twitter and asking smart questions about their book.
• Networking with strangers on LinkedIn by offering helpful insights.

8. Women Can Excel as Power Connectors

Women face unique opportunities and challenges in networking. Advocating for themselves without reservation is essential. By being persistently kind yet clear about goals, women can leverage their talents effectively.

Supporting other women actively and creating “stiletto networks” can transform professional dynamics. Collaboration builds stronger, mutually beneficial relationships.

Examples

• A female entrepreneur seeking guidance from experienced women leaders.
• Using “relentlessly pleasant” behavior to resolve conflicts in a corporate setting.
• Sharing career tips in a women-focused association, growing everyone’s opportunities.

9. Power Connecting Starts With Confidence

Shyness can hold anyone back from building meaningful relationships. Overcoming social hesitation by acting confident, even briefly, can open more doors than expected.

Approaching situations as though you’re self-assured encourages others to engage with you. Remember, your conversation partner could also be nervous and can take comfort in your confidence.

Examples

• Smiling and striking up a conversation with a previously intimidating coworker.
• Acting comfortable during a networking event to stand out as approachable.
• Initiating small talk with a stranger while waiting for coffee.

Takeaways

1. Organize your network with the 5+50+100 rule to understand whom to prioritize.
2. Diversify your relationships by seeking out people with opposing perspectives.
3. Act confident at your next event, even if you’re shy—others will mirror your energy.