Living In Your Top 1%

Do you feel like you have untapped greatness within you? Living in Your Top 1% offers the tools and mindset to unlock your best self and live with purpose.

1. Take Ownership of Your Life

It's easy to blame external factors for unhappiness or dissatisfaction, but true progress begins with taking personal responsibility. This involves reflecting honestly on where you are in your life, identifying what really matters to you, and taking steps to address these areas. By embracing accountability, you empower yourself to create meaningful changes rather than waiting for circumstances to change on their own.

Alissa Finerman suggests breaking life into core areas such as health, career, finances, and relationships, and rating your current level of satisfaction in each. This exercise helps you pinpoint where attention is truly needed. For example, if your health score is low, it might become a top priority moving forward. By focusing on what you value most, you align your efforts with your authentic self.

To make this actionable, Finerman recommends creating a list of simple actions that prioritize yourself, such as a daily walk or reading for 15 minutes. Similar to the airplane oxygen mask rule, you need to take care of yourself first to be effective in helping others and pursuing your goals.

Examples

• A business professional prioritizing work-life balance by scheduling one self-care activity daily.
• A young parent realizing they need to improve their health to keep up with their kids and starting a workout plan.
• A hobbyist rediscovering their passion for painting by dedicating one evening a week to creating art.

2. Cultivate a Growth Mindset

The way you react to setbacks defines whether they halt your progress or help you grow. According to Carol Dweck's "growth mindset" concept, challenges and failures aren’t permanent roadblocks but opportunities to improve. Finerman emphasizes adopting a learning-focused mentality to continuously evolve.

Shifting from a fixed to a growth mindset requires small steps, like replacing negative self-talk with affirmations of effort and progress. For instance, instead of saying, "I’m no good at public speaking," say, "With practice, I’ll become better at presenting." Positivity acts as a multiplier, fostering the energy and optimism needed to succeed.

Psychologist Barbara Fredrickson’s research highlights the importance of maintaining a "positivity ratio"—experiencing three positive emotions for every negative emotion. Using tools like gratitude journaling or consciously avoiding negativity can help shift your outlook from fixed to growth-oriented.

Examples

• A student failing a math test and deciding to seek tutoring instead of giving up.
• An entrepreneur learning from a failed product launch and applying the lessons to their next venture.
• A writer receiving criticism on a draft and using the feedback to refine their skills.

3. Harness Your Strengths

Instead of expending energy on fixing weaknesses, focus on your unique talents and strengths. This approach not only makes work feel less draining but also propels you toward peak performance. Research by Gallup shows that individuals who utilize their strengths daily experience significantly greater engagement and life satisfaction.

Finerman encourages readers to identify what they naturally excel at. Tools like the VIA Survey of Character Strengths and StrengthsFinder assessment can pinpoint your core abilities. Once identified, find ways to incorporate these talents into your daily activities and goals.

Regularly using your strengths creates positive emotions that lead to better relationships, creative solutions, and opportunities for growth, forming an upward spiral of success.

Examples

• A manager skilled at team relationships devises innovative ways to boost collaboration at work.
• A creative individual starting a blog to share their artistic talents regularly.
• An athlete leveraging their discipline and focus in training to succeed in personal finances.

4. Leave Your Comfort Zone, But Not Too Far

Personal development flourishes when you step into your stretch zone—a space slightly outside your comfort zone but not so far that it creates overwhelming stress. This middle ground is where growth feels challenging yet manageable.

Daily actions, no matter how small, can gently push you into new territory. A simple approach is scheduling priorities such as workouts or skills practice, while staying accountable through accountability partners. Extend yourself but stay mindful of burnout; apply the mantra "Do it, dump it, or delegate it" to stay efficient and focused.

Balancing challenge with control ensures steady growth without overburdening yourself. By consistently embracing the stretch zone, you remain sharp, adaptable, and motivated.

Examples

• A shy individual signing up for a public speaking class rather than jumping straight into a keynote speech.
• A fitness beginner starting with 15-minute jogs instead of running a marathon.
• A busy professional delegating secondary tasks while tackling challenging, career-advancing projects.

5. Set SMART Goals That Truly Matter

Goal-setting works best when goals align with your values and follow the SMART framework: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Timely. Prioritizing what's meaningful ensures motivation remains strong throughout the journey.

For example, don’t vaguely aim to "get fit." Instead, try a specific plan like "attend yoga two evenings a week for the next three months." Concrete targets foster accountability, and breaking them into smaller steps ensures manageable progress. The “kaizen” concept of continuous, minor improvements builds momentum and builds long-term success.

Goals also need to resonate with your priorities. For instance, someone valuing family adventure might aim to plan quarterly camping trips rather than professional milestones they’re indifferent to.

Examples

• An aspiring chef setting a measurable goal of mastering three recipes each week.
• A sales representative committing to make ten new client calls daily.
• A family-oriented person organizing monthly movie nights to build stronger home connections.

6. Pursue Actions Consistently

Anybody can start working toward a goal, but persistence is key to achieving it. Consistency means adhering to a regular effort, whether that’s daily, weekly, or monthly, to create progress over time.

Choose the path that better aligns with your overall objectives and ensures measurable improvement. Evaluate your options critically, and select strategies that you can commit to with ease. Stay motivated by enlisting accountability partners to hold you responsible for sticking to your plan.

Repeating actions over time builds habits, which ultimately brings sustainable success. As routines form, tasks that once felt daunting become second nature.

Examples

• A writer committing to drafting 500 words daily until completing a novel.
• An athlete training consistently every morning for an upcoming competition.
• A student dedicating one hour every evening to exam prep over three months.

7. Learn to Overcome Challenges

Roadblocks are inevitable on the path to success, but they don’t have to derail you. Refining your perspective and treating problems as opportunities paves the way for achievement.

When faced with rejection or failure, brainstorm and write down potential solutions. For example, missing a job promotion might inspire you to enhance your skills or network. Focus on the lessons learned from failure and use them to strengthen your resolve.

Success stories like Edison’s light bulb invention—achieved after over 2,000 failures—illustrate that persistence is often the determining factor in realizing ambitious efforts.

Examples

• A startup founder pivoting after unsuccessful initial efforts.
• A teacher refining lesson plans after students struggle with material.
• A job seeker reorganizing their resume and expanding their applications after repeated rejections.

8. Build Resilience to Bounce Back

Developing resilience, or the ability to recover from setbacks, is vital for long-term growth. This requires reframing failure as a stepping stone to achievement and strengthening supportive relationships.

Build resilience by reflecting on past mistakes and the valuable lessons they’ve offered. Doing so shifts your focus from the disappointment of failure toward constructive improvement. Additionally, nurturing ties with supportive people—whether family, friends, or colleagues—provides encouragement and help during tough times.

Even celebrated figures like Michael Jordan and Walt Disney experienced rejection before finding success, proving that resilience often precedes triumph.

Examples

• A musician refining their sound after being turned away by multiple booking agents.
• High-risk youth transforming their environment through positive mentorship and resilience training.
• An inventor persisting after designs receive criticism or initial failure.

9. Create Balance in What Matters

Without balance, life can quickly tilt toward chaos, leaving important priorities neglected. A balanced life acknowledges your values while giving equal weight to work, relationships, and personal well-being.

Achieve balance by recognizing non-negotiable values, like attending family events or prioritizing mental health. When opportunities arise, weigh their impact on other areas and make conscious decisions. For example, turn down overtime if it comes at the cost of missing a loved one’s milestone.

Being present and mindful in each area instills harmony and prevents a single focus from overshadowing others.

Examples

• A CEO declining extra meetings to attend their child’s recital.
• A freelancer setting boundaries to protect weekends for relaxation.
• A student balancing academics with meaningful social activities.

Takeaways

1. Begin by identifying and rating the core areas of your life to understand where action is needed most.
2. Develop resilience by reflecting on failures and drawing lessons from past setbacks.
3. Use the SMART framework to set goals and practice taking small, consistent steps daily to achieve them.