Loving Your Business

How you think defines how your business thrives—or survives. Learn to rewrite your thoughts and transform your business into an asset you truly love.

1. Your Brain Follows Its "Instruction Manual"—but It May Need Revising

We all operate with an "instruction manual" formed by life experiences and teachings, guiding our actions and decisions. This manual, created by our upbringing and professional life, impacts every move we make. For example, if you were taught that success requires endless hard work, you might avoid taking breaks—even to your detriment.

The subconscious, or primitive brain, also plays a major role by scanning for threats. This is a survival instinct, but in today’s world, it often generates negativity where none exists. That negative mindset can block forward momentum, especially in business. For example, when faced with competitive challenges, you might automatically assume failure without exploring new paths.

Breaking these ingrained responses is possible but requires identifying faulty thought patterns stored in the instruction manual. Without examining these assumptions, business owners fall into cycles of stress, overwork, and overwhelm.

Examples

• Someone with ingrained beliefs about "working harder equals success" might refuse to delegate responsibilities, leading to burnout.
• A manager's manual insisting "never trust competitors" can prevent beneficial partnerships.
• An entrepreneur who fears "risk will ruin me" avoids taking innovative steps, stunting growth.

2. Rewrite Your Personal Rulebook to Build Better Patterns

Changing your internal rules starts with identifying the underlying assumptions governing your choices. By spotlighting what you believe to be "musts," you can evaluate which of them are helpful and which are limiting.

The process involves self-coaching exercises, such as writing down how you feel and mapping how you'd rather feel. For instance, if pressure from deadlines overwhelms you, consider rewriting your rule to emphasize learning to say no or externalizing tasks by hiring help. These small shifts rewire how you approach challenges.

Finally, identify your ultimate goals, such as creating a smoothly running business. Cross-check your rewritten rules against these desires to make sure they support, rather than hinder, what you want to achieve.

Examples

• A business owner overwhelmed by customer demands rewrites rules to emphasize prioritizing loyal clients over everyone.
• A stressed CEO evaluating their day finds inefficiencies in multitasking and creates a rule to batch tasks.
• An entrepreneur creates new rules emphasizing team growth instead of micromanaging, boosting company morale.

3. It’s Not What Happens, It’s How You Think That Counts

Events are neutral, but your reactions often aren’t. Debbie King emphasizes that your emotions about a situation arise from your thoughts, not the actual facts. This awareness can shift your decision-making and reduce stress.

By mapping thoughts, feelings, actions, and results, you can see how negative thinking spirals into poor outcomes. For example, when facing late client payments, assuming "I’ll never get paid," creates stress which impairs well-reasoned planning. Instead, fostering deliberate, constructive thoughts leads to better problem-solving.

To overcome negativity, replace toxic assumptions like "this won’t work" with productive ones, such as "let’s experiment and find out what happens." Positive thinking doesn’t mean ignoring problems—it means framing solutions that align with your goals.

Examples

• A restaurant owner avoids spiraling into despair over delayed shipments by brainstorming temporary menus.
• A manager reframes "my team is incompetent" into "how can I improve training" to create constructive solutions.
• An entrepreneur facing low sales shifts the internal dialogue from "I’m a failure" to "this is a moment to learn what’s missing."

4. Eliminate Interference and the Blame Game

Interference—those emotional or physical barriers—stops you from being your best self. By identifying and minimizing these distractions, you can create fewer friction points in daily operations.

These interferences include burnout-driven paradigms like "I have to handle everything myself." Similarly, physical interference emerges from prioritizing business over personal health, weakening long-term resilience. Recognizing that avoiding the gym or poor dietary habits directly impact productivity could drive better choices.

Blaming external factors diverts your responsibility for outcomes. Instead, resolve to focus on adjustments within your system to address why errors occurred. For example, instead of blaming underperforming employees, assess gaps in their training or tools.

Examples

• A founder suffering from insomnia improves work efficiency by prioritizing routine sleep schedules.
• A manager eliminates distractions like endless emails by investing in team communication platforms.
• When faced with a failed sale, an entrepreneur tweaks their pitch instead of blaming an uninterested client.

5. Be a Thought Watcher to Manage the Unsolvable

Some business dilemmas are polarities, not problems with single solutions. Balancing opposites—quality versus cost, or individual versus team focus—demands maintaining flexibility rather than fixating on one side.

Learning to watch your thoughts allows you to evaluate polarities objectively. By writing concerns down each morning, you externalize ideas, making it easier to see patterns and adapt strategies as conditions change. This practice keeps your mind calm and open to adjustments.

Understanding that shifting your approach over time (e.g., hiring more staff temporarily, then scaling back) is part of business rhythms helps alleviate stress. You don’t have to solve every equation—you just manage.

Examples

• A company juggling quality initiatives versus profit margins balances these by adjusting resources quarterly.
• An entrepreneur weighing team expansion maintains balance by drafting flexible employment contracts for pilots.
• A manager debating structural rigidity allows for ad hoc meetings amidst a formal process.

6. Build a Business That’s More Than a "Lifestyle Project"

Running a business doesn’t mean you’re tied to every daily task. Your company should become virtually self-operational. Treat it as a valuable asset by consistently increasing its worth rather than centering it around your endless work.

Key to this is streamlining services into packaged systems clients can recognize and rely upon while hiring skilled team members you can depend on. Then evaluate whether your setup generates regular, recurring revenue from subscriptions or retainers.

If the business becomes too dependent on you, its market value diminishes. Step back and think like an investor—how attractive would this operation appear to someone else?

Examples

• A consultancy creates a trademarked program for client success rather than bespoke advice every time.
• A digital entrepreneur implements monthly subscription models to stabilize income.
• A salon owner transitions client bookings and payments to fully automated platforms.

7. Love Your Business but Recognize When It’s Time to Let Go

When your business is well-built, attractive sales offers might emerge. Deciding whether to sell depends on reframing emotional uncertainty as opportunity. Instead of fearing loss, list benefits of both selling and staying.

If selling, present the best view of your company’s brand value while emphasizing its growth potential. Show buyers realistic three-year operational plans so they see your business not just as it is, but as it could be.

Selling doesn’t mean regret but pride in what you’ve built. Letting go allows space to explore new goals, retirement dreams, or fresh endeavors.

Examples

• A tech founder reflects on declining hands-on interest, opting to sell and mentor startups instead.
• An owner considering buyers drafts a dynamic three-year expansion roadmap emphasizing ROI.
• A restauranteur successfully markets their eatery by highlighting community impact plus scalable processes.

Takeaways

1. Identify unhelpful assumptions in your internal "manual" and replace them with rules that align with your business goals.
2. Train yourself to spot polarities and embrace balance—not everything needs permanent solutions.
3. Transition your energy from doing everything to delegating tasks, creating a self-sustaining enterprise.