Negotiation isn’t about splitting everything equally; it’s about creating and dividing the value that wouldn’t exist without collaboration.
1. The Negotiation Pie: A New Way to Think About Deals
Negotiation often feels like a tug-of-war, but the negotiation pie approach reframes it entirely. Instead of focusing on the entire deal, this method zeroes in on the additional value created by the negotiation itself. This "pie" is what both parties should aim to split fairly. By isolating the extra value, the negotiation pie eliminates power struggles and perceived inequalities.
For example, consider Alice and Bob at a pizzeria. Without a deal, they’d get six slices of pizza between them. But if they agree, they get twelve slices. The negotiation isn’t about the whole pizza; it’s about the six extra slices. Both Alice and Bob are equally necessary to create this value, so they should split the six slices evenly. This approach ensures fairness and avoids unnecessary conflict.
This method also challenges the common belief that splitting everything 50/50 is always fair. If one party has a stronger fallback position, a 50/50 split might actually leave them worse off. The negotiation pie focuses on what’s gained through collaboration, ensuring both parties walk away better than they started.
Examples
- Alice and Bob split the six extra pizza slices evenly, reflecting their equal contribution to creating the value.
- A business deal where two companies pool resources to generate additional revenue, splitting the profits from the added value.
- A salary negotiation where the focus is on the extra value the employee brings to the company, not just market averages.
2. Power Imbalances Are Often Misleading
Many negotiations are clouded by perceived power imbalances. One party might seem to have the upper hand due to their fallback options or resources. However, the negotiation pie approach reveals that both sides are equally important in creating additional value, leveling the playing field.
Take Alice and Bob again. If Alice’s fallback option is four slices and Bob’s is two, it might seem like Alice has more power. But without Bob, Alice can’t access the six extra slices. This means they both have equal power when it comes to the negotiation pie. Recognizing this can help both parties approach the table with more confidence and fairness.
This perspective is especially useful in high-stakes negotiations, like salary discussions. An employee might feel powerless against a large company, but the company needs the employee’s skills to generate value. By focusing on the pie, both sides can see their mutual dependence and work toward a fair outcome.
Examples
- A job candidate negotiating a salary realizes their unique skills are essential to the company’s success.
- Two businesses negotiating a merger recognize that their combined resources create value neither could achieve alone.
- A landlord and tenant negotiating rent focus on the benefits of a long-term lease rather than short-term gains.
3. Fairness Isn’t Always 50/50
Splitting everything down the middle might seem fair, but it often ignores the realities of fallback options. The negotiation pie approach ensures fairness by focusing on the value created through negotiation, not arbitrary divisions.
Imagine Alice’s fallback option increases to seven slices while Bob’s remains at two. A 50/50 split of the whole pizza would leave Alice worse off than her fallback. Instead, they should split the six extra slices evenly, giving Alice three additional slices and Bob three. This way, both parties gain equally from the negotiation.
This principle applies to many real-world scenarios. For instance, in business partnerships, one party might bring more resources to the table. A fair deal would account for this imbalance while still ensuring both sides benefit from the collaboration.
Examples
- A business partner with more initial investment receives a larger share of profits, but both partners split the added value equally.
- A couple dividing household chores considers each person’s available time and energy rather than splitting tasks 50/50.
- A freelance designer negotiates a project fee based on the unique value they bring, not just industry averages.
4. Build a Constructive Negotiation Environment
Negotiations often start with aggressive stances and ultimatums, but this approach rarely leads to productive outcomes. Instead, focus on creating a collaborative environment where both parties work toward a shared goal: growing and splitting the pie.
The first step is understanding the other party’s perspective. Are they expecting a 50/50 split? Do they see themselves as having more power? By addressing these assumptions and introducing the negotiation pie concept, you can align both sides toward a common purpose.
For example, Alice and Bob pool their investments to achieve a higher return. Initially, Bob suggests splitting the profits proportionally, but Alice reframes the discussion around the negotiation pie. By focusing on the extra value created, they agree to split the additional profits evenly.
Examples
- A team negotiating a project budget focuses on maximizing the project’s impact rather than individual department gains.
- A couple planning a vacation works together to find a destination that maximizes their shared enjoyment.
- A business negotiation starts with both sides agreeing on the goal of creating mutual value.
5. Use Logic to Overcome Resistance
Not everyone will immediately embrace the negotiation pie approach. Some people cling to their initial positions, believing they’re entitled to more. In these cases, logic and reframing can help them see the benefits of collaboration.
Alice convinces Bob to split their investment returns evenly by showing how a proportional split would be unfair in different scenarios. By keeping the discussion logical and focused on fairness, she helps Bob understand the value of the negotiation pie.
This strategy works because it appeals to the other party’s self-interest. Instead of asking them to empathize with you, show how their position could backfire under different circumstances.
Examples
- A salesperson reframes a discount request by showing how it would affect the customer’s long-term benefits.
- A mediator helps two parties see how their demands would look if the roles were reversed.
- A manager convinces an employee to accept a new role by highlighting how it aligns with their career goals.
6. Fight Fire with Water, Not Fire
When faced with aggression or ultimatums, it’s tempting to respond in kind. But this only escalates the conflict. Instead, deescalate the situation by staying calm and using logic to guide the discussion.
For instance, when Alice refuses to budge on her $25 million asking price, Bob asks if she’d accept $26 million hypothetically. This simple question makes Alice realize her position isn’t as fixed as she thought, opening the door to further negotiation.
This technique works because it disrupts the other party’s rigid thinking. By introducing hypotheticals, you encourage them to reconsider their stance without feeling attacked.
Examples
- A mediator asks both sides in a dispute to imagine the outcome if their roles were reversed.
- A parent negotiating with a teenager uses hypotheticals to explore compromises.
- A business leader deescalates a heated meeting by asking open-ended questions.
7. Empathy Unlocks Stalemates
Sometimes, the key to breaking a deadlock is understanding the other party’s deeper needs. By asking questions and showing genuine interest, you can find creative solutions that satisfy both sides.
When Alice refuses to lower her gas station’s price, Bob learns she needs the money for a sailing trip and a job search. He offers her a job managing the station after her trip, reducing her financial needs and making the deal possible.
This approach works because it shows you’re willing to meet the other party halfway. By addressing their underlying concerns, you increase the chances of reaching an agreement.
Examples
- A landlord offers a tenant a longer lease to address their concerns about stability.
- A company adds flexible hours to a job offer to attract a candidate with family responsibilities.
- A couple compromises on wedding plans by focusing on what matters most to each person.
8. Open Communication Builds Trust
Holding back information might seem like a smart strategy, but it often backfires. Open communication fosters trust and makes it easier to find mutually beneficial solutions.
For example, Alice and Bob achieve better outcomes when they share their fallback options and goals. This transparency helps them focus on the negotiation pie instead of second-guessing each other’s motives.
By being open and honest, you create a foundation for collaboration. This doesn’t mean revealing everything, but sharing enough to build trust and align your goals.
Examples
- A team shares their budget constraints to find a realistic project plan.
- A couple discusses their financial goals before making a major purchase.
- A business partner discloses their priorities to streamline negotiations.
9. Negotiation Is About Relationships, Not Just Deals
Every negotiation is an opportunity to build a relationship. By focusing on fairness and collaboration, you create goodwill that can lead to future opportunities.
Alice and Bob’s negotiations often end with both sides feeling satisfied, strengthening their partnership. This positive dynamic makes it easier for them to work together in the future.
By prioritizing relationships, you ensure that every deal is a step toward long-term success. This mindset helps you approach negotiations with empathy and a focus on mutual benefit.
Examples
- A company builds loyalty by negotiating fair contracts with suppliers.
- A couple strengthens their relationship by finding win-win solutions to conflicts.
- A manager earns trust by negotiating promotions based on merit and fairness.
Takeaways
- Focus on the value created by negotiation, not perceived power or fairness.
- Use logic and empathy to address resistance and find creative solutions.
- Build trust through open communication and a collaborative mindset.