Introduction
In the fast-paced world of business, success often comes with a price. Many highly successful individuals possess unpleasant personality traits and bad habits that they mistakenly believe are crucial to their achievements. Marshall Goldsmith, an experienced executive coach, challenges this notion in his book "What Got You Here, Won't Get You There." He argues that these negative behaviors are actually holding people back from reaching even greater heights in their careers and personal lives.
This book summary delves into the key ideas presented by Goldsmith, offering insights on how to recognize and overcome harmful habits that may be hindering your progress. By examining common pitfalls of successful people and providing practical advice for improvement, Goldsmith's work serves as a valuable guide for anyone looking to enhance their leadership skills and become a better colleague and person overall.
The Superstition of Success
One of the most common traps that successful people fall into is attributing their achievements to behaviors that may actually be detrimental. This superstitious thinking can lead to the perpetuation of bad habits, as individuals mistakenly believe that these traits are essential to their success.
Goldsmith illustrates this concept with an example of an executive who was an excellent performer but a terrible listener. Despite his colleagues' frustration with his poor listening skills, the executive convinced himself that this trait was crucial to his success, shielding him from bad ideas and protecting his creativity.
This flawed logic can be difficult to correct, as successful people often become defensive when criticized. They may struggle to see how their behavior negatively impacts others or hinders their potential for even greater success. As professionals climb the corporate ladder, skills like effective communication and empathy become increasingly important, making it crucial to address these issues before they become significant obstacles.
The Importance of Avoiding Mistakes
In today's business world, there's often a strong focus on achieving positive results and bringing new ideas to the table. However, Goldsmith argues that avoiding mistakes and stopping harmful behaviors can be just as important – if not more so – than making grand achievements.
Unfortunately, most workplace cultures don't recognize or reward individuals for preventing bad decisions or walking away from potentially detrimental deals. This lack of acknowledgment can lead to a skewed perception of what constitutes success and may encourage risky behavior in pursuit of visible accomplishments.
Goldsmith uses the example of Gerald Levin, former chairman of Time Warner, to illustrate this point. While Levin had built an impressive reputation through his work with HBO and Time Warner, his decision to merge with AOL nearly destroyed the company. Had Levin recognized the potential pitfalls and walked away from the deal, he could have preserved his legacy and saved the company from significant hardship.
To address this issue, companies should foster a culture that encourages employees to stop engaging in destructive behavior and recognizes the value of avoiding mistakes. This shift in perspective can lead to more thoughtful decision-making and ultimately contribute to long-term success.
Breaking Free from Fixed Mindsets
One of the main reasons bad habits persist is the belief that our personalities and behaviors are fixed and unchangeable. This mindset leads people to excuse their negative traits by claiming, "That's just who I am!" This attitude is particularly prevalent among successful individuals, who may feel entitled to a few flaws due to their achievements.
Goldsmith emphasizes that flaws are not virtues and that holding onto negative behaviors can alienate others and hinder long-term success. He shares the story of a CEO who never gave positive feedback to his staff, justifying his behavior by claiming he wasn't a "phony" person. After working with Goldsmith, the CEO realized that his lack of praise was negatively impacting his team's performance. By letting go of his fixed notions about his personality, he was able to start complimenting his employees regularly, leading to improved results.
Another factor contributing to the persistence of bad habits is the failure to recognize how one's behavior is perceived by others. Goldsmith provides an example of a financial expert who lost a significant opportunity because he was so focused on selling his expertise that he forgot to ask relevant questions about the potential client's needs.
The Double-Edged Sword of Winning
While the desire to win can be a powerful motivator for success, Goldsmith warns that taking this drive too far can lead to problematic behavior in both professional and personal settings. He argues that successful people often struggle to differentiate between a healthy competitive spirit and an unhealthy obsession with winning at all costs.
To illustrate this point, Goldsmith presents a scenario where a couple is choosing a restaurant. If the chosen restaurant turns out to be disappointing, many successful individuals admit they would spend the evening criticizing the choice and implying that their own suggestion would have been better. This behavior stems from the compulsive desire to win, even in situations where it's unnecessary or counterproductive.
The author encourages readers to fight against this urge to always be right or to have the upper hand. He suggests that suppressing the need to win in trivial matters can lead to more satisfying relationships and better outcomes in both personal and professional life.
The Art of Listening Without Improving
As leaders climb the corporate ladder, the ability to listen effectively becomes increasingly important. However, many successful individuals struggle with the urge to constantly improve upon others' ideas, even when it's not necessary or helpful.
Goldsmith explains that this behavior can be demotivating for employees and team members. When a leader consistently adds their own suggestions to every idea presented, it can diminish the enthusiasm and commitment of the person who originally proposed the concept. This is because employees often view their superiors' suggestions as direct orders, making it difficult for them to disagree or maintain ownership of their ideas.
The author provides an example of a CEO who made seemingly minor suggestions about packaging colors to his design team. These casual comments led to confusion and frustration among the team members, who felt compelled to incorporate every suggestion, even when they conflicted with previous directions.
To avoid these scenarios, Goldsmith advises leaders to practice active listening without immediately trying to improve upon every idea presented. He suggests that leaders should be aware of their tendency to add "but" or "however" to their responses and instead focus on encouraging and supporting their team members' contributions.
The Dangers of Goal Obsession
While having clear goals is generally considered a positive trait, Goldsmith warns that becoming overly fixated on specific outcomes can lead to negative consequences. He introduces the concept of "goal obsession," which occurs when individuals focus so intensely on achieving particular objectives that they lose sight of the bigger picture and compromise their values.
The author shares the story of a marketing executive who was known for her creativity and ability to deliver results. However, her obsession with achieving her goals led her to take credit for her team's successes without acknowledging their contributions. This behavior ultimately damaged her reputation among her staff and made it difficult for her to retain talented employees.
Goldsmith also references the famous "Good Samaritan" experiment to illustrate how goal obsession can cloud judgment and lead to unethical behavior. In this study, seminary students who were rushing to deliver a sermon on the topic of Good Samaritanism overwhelmingly ignored a person in distress, demonstrating how fixation on a specific goal can cause individuals to overlook their core values and principles.
Embracing Feedback for Personal Growth
One of the most significant challenges for successful individuals is learning to accept and utilize critical feedback. Goldsmith explains that many high-achievers have an inflated sense of their own contributions and abilities, making it difficult for them to acknowledge areas for improvement.
To overcome this obstacle, the author encourages readers to actively seek out feedback from those around them. He suggests paying attention to casual remarks and body language, as these can provide valuable insights into how others perceive our behavior. Goldsmith recommends keeping a daily log of comments received and categorizing them as positive or negative to identify patterns and areas for improvement.
Additionally, the author advises readers to be mindful of their self-aggrandizing remarks, as these often mask underlying weaknesses. By recognizing and addressing these issues, individuals can work towards genuine self-improvement and enhanced leadership skills.
The Power of Apology and Gratitude
Goldsmith emphasizes the importance of two simple yet powerful phrases: "I'm sorry" and "thank you." He argues that many successful people avoid using these expressions, mistakenly believing that they convey weakness or submission. However, the author contends that both apologizing and expressing gratitude can have profound positive effects on relationships and personal growth.
When it comes to apologizing, Goldsmith stresses the importance of taking responsibility without offering excuses or justifications. He cites the example of Richard Clarke, former U.S. National Security Coordinator, who offered a straightforward apology to the families of 9/11 victims. Although some criticized Clarke for overstepping his authority, his willingness to take responsibility helped people move forward after the tragedy.
Similarly, expressing gratitude can defuse tense situations and strengthen relationships. Goldsmith shares a personal anecdote about a near-death experience that made him realize how many people he had never properly thanked. He encourages readers to express appreciation more frequently and sincerely, as it's often one of the biggest regrets people have when losing loved ones.
The Process of Lasting Change
Goldsmith emphasizes that meaningful personal change is a gradual process that requires consistent effort and feedback from others. He advises readers to create a plan for following up with colleagues regularly over an extended period (12-18 months) to gauge progress and seek input on their behavior.
This approach serves two purposes: it keeps the individual accountable for their efforts to change, and it helps others recognize and acknowledge the improvements being made. Goldsmith uses the example of former New York City Mayor Ed Koch, who famously asked constituents, "How'm I doing?" This simple question not only demonstrated Koch's commitment to improvement but also forced him to act on criticism to avoid hearing the same negative feedback repeatedly.
The author cautions against the expectation of overnight change, noting that many leadership development programs and motivational speeches can create unrealistic expectations. He compares the process of changing behavior to quitting smoking – even when people understand the negative consequences, breaking ingrained habits takes time and persistent effort.
Conclusion
"What Got You Here, Won't Get You There" offers valuable insights for anyone looking to improve their leadership skills and personal relationships. By identifying and addressing common pitfalls of successful individuals, Marshall Goldsmith provides a roadmap for continuous growth and development.
Key takeaways from the book include:
- Recognize that past success doesn't guarantee future success, and be willing to critically examine your behaviors and habits.
- Avoid attributing success to negative traits or superstitious thinking.
- Understand the importance of preventing mistakes and stopping harmful behaviors.
- Break free from fixed mindsets about personality and be open to change.
- Balance the desire to win with empathy and consideration for others.
- Practice active listening without always trying to improve upon others' ideas.
- Be aware of goal obsession and its potential to compromise values and judgment.
- Embrace feedback as a tool for personal growth and improvement.
- Utilize the power of apology and gratitude in both personal and professional relationships.
- Approach change as a gradual process, seeking consistent feedback and maintaining long-term commitment.
By implementing these principles, readers can work towards becoming better leaders, colleagues, and individuals overall. Goldsmith's work serves as a reminder that success is not just about achieving goals, but also about continual self-improvement and fostering positive relationships with others.
As you reflect on the insights from "What Got You Here, Won't Get You There," consider how you can apply these lessons to your own life and career. Remember that change takes time and effort, but with persistence and self-awareness, you can overcome the habits that may be holding you back from reaching your full potential.
Take the time to seek feedback from those around you, practice active listening, and be willing to acknowledge and address your shortcomings. By doing so, you'll not only enhance your own success but also contribute to a more positive and productive environment for those around you.
Ultimately, the journey of self-improvement is ongoing, and the willingness to adapt and grow is what truly sets great leaders apart. As you move forward in your career and personal life, keep in mind that what got you here won't necessarily get you there – but with the right mindset and tools, you can continue to evolve and achieve even greater success in the future.