Dream Big Summary

What if the only thing standing between your current life and your dreams is the courage to say 'yes' to yourself?

1. Knowing Yourself is the Starting Point

To chase your dreams, you first need to understand who you truly are. Many people lose sight of their goals because they forget why they wanted them in the first place. Discovering yourself is like reconnecting with an old friend, and it requires time and honest reflection.

Self-examination isn't easy. It might reveal truths you've buried for years—like wanting to live abroad, quit a stagnant career, or leave an unfulfilling relationship. Avoid distractions and deeply examine your priorities, fears, and desires. Visualize your life as a snow-covered landscape. Dig past the surface to the silent, deep ice cave below where your genuine motivations lie.

This process demands courage and time. For example, one person scheduled weekly self-reflection sessions outside a dialysis center to ensure undisturbed focus. Facing who you are unlocks clarity about what truly drives you, setting the stage for pursuing your dreams.

Examples

• Deliberately setting aside quiet hours to journal about your deepest feelings.
• Realizing that anxiety about finances holds you back from going back to college.
• Acknowledging you’ve always dreamt of being a parent but avoided decisions to make it happen.

2. Be Honest About Where You Are

Before going forward, take inventory of where you stand. Think of the question, "Where are you?"—not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. Without assessing your starting point, moving toward your goals will feel aimless.

This step means confronting tough truths. You might have to admit you're stuck in an unfulfilling marriage, drowning in a destructive habit, or just feeling lost at work. Expressing where you are is essential, even if it’s uncomfortable. Speak to yourself, tell a friend, or even write it down to externalize your feelings. Naming the problem exposes it to light, making it a starting line, not a dead end.

For instance, recognizing that you’re in a routine job with no clear future can help pivot you toward seeking more meaningful work. Acknowledging dissatisfaction opens the door for change and instills hope that better days are ahead.

Examples

• Writing a letter to yourself about your frustrations and reviewing it later to reflect.
• Sharing your challenges with a confidant over coffee for a fresh perspective.
• Journaling a list of areas in life where you feel “stuck” or held back.

3. Define Your Goals Clearly

Vague desires produce vague results. If you want to move toward your dreams, get specific about what they are and how they look. When you clarify your goals, you turn aspirations into actionable paths.

For instance, wanting to "be generous" isn’t precise enough. Does generosity mean donating money, time, or kindness? Narrowing it down, such as starting a local food bank or volunteering weekly, gives focus. When you get specific, even daunting dreams—like becoming a Nobel-winning scientist—become step-by-step plans.

Dream big, but plan small. Each clear definition of what you want helps outline the actions needed to get there. As you identify your exact goals, they feel more attainable and bring a sense of excitement.

Examples

• Instead of saying, "I want to be healthy," set a goal like completing a 5K run.
• Break down "save money to travel" by specifying costs, dates, and locations.
• Work toward becoming a novelist by committing to write one chapter a month.

4. Prioritize Your Dreams

Not every dream carries the same significance. Some may be fleeting whims, while others have the potential to truly enrich your life. Sorting and prioritizing your goals ensures you focus on what matters most.

Ask yourself questions: Will this goal still matter in ten or even a hundred years? Does it positively impact others? For instance, while owning a Lamborghini might offer temporary excitement, establishing a charity could bring purpose and fulfillment. Smaller aspirations can also bring joy and momentum, like learning to roller skate or picking up painting.

Ultimately, consider what legacy you want to leave behind. The dreams you choose to pursue should align with the kind of person you want to be remembered as.

Examples

• Choosing to mentor students rather than spending money on luxury items.
• Deciding to travel with family over buying a second home.
• Asking if career goals align with how you want to impact the world.

5. Challenge Negative Beliefs

Limiting beliefs and fears often whisper discouragement just when we’re ready to start. To move forward, you have to first address these doubts.

Take time to identify inner voices that sow insecurity: “I’m too old for this,” “I’m bad at public speaking,” or “I’ll never earn enough money.” These often stem from past experiences—an overly critical teacher or an offhand comment from a parent. These fears aren’t your truth; they’re hand-me-downs from someone else’s life.

Recognizing where these beliefs come from allows you to separate yourself from them. The author’s father’s rattlesnake rule, for instance, became an unnecessary fear he carried into adulthood. By uncovering and labeling these influences, you can reject them and regain the confidence to dream.

Examples

• Realizing hesitation comes from a childhood fear of failing publicly in front of others.
• Facing financial concerns after recalling a family member’s outdated advice on job security.
• Recognizing that criticism from a previous boss doesn’t reflect your worth.

6. Take Bold Action

Dreams stay dormant without action. Taking the first steps toward a goal, even if nerve-wracking, is absolutely essential. As you begin, adopt a fearless attitude and stay persistent.

Audacity can lead to surprising opportunities. If you’re an aspiring writer, email a novelist whose work you admire for advice. A simple message might open a door. Even repeated efforts can pay off; the author’s persistence with yearly letters to the Pope serve as encouragement to keep trying.

Success often lies in small beginnings. Consider Ryan Graves responding to a tweet—it landed him a role at Uber, which blossomed into an incredible career. Taking bold steps may feel uncomfortable, but without risk, opportunities are missed entirely.

Examples

• Calling a potential mentor despite nerves, hoping to glean valuable insights.
• Volunteering in a related field as a small but meaningful step toward a dream career.
• Sending emails to businesses or leaders you admire, asking for guidance.

7. Find Meaning in Helping Others

Pure self-fulfillment feels hollow over time. The richest dreams involve positively influencing others alongside pursuing your personal goals.

Helping others boosts your own sense of purpose. Consider pairing your dreams with value for the people around you. For instance, you might dream of being a famous chef. Why not teach culinary skills to underprivileged teens? By serving others, your achievements become more meaningful.

Dreams that contribute to the greater good often garner a deeper, longer-lasting satisfaction than self-centered goals.

Examples

• Starting a business but dedicating a percentage of profits to local charities.
• Dreaming of a best-selling book yet using its royalties to fund literacy programs.
• Pursuing a music career with the aim of raising awareness about social issues.

8. Keep Relationships a Priority

Amid chasing towering ambitions, your relationships should remain firm cornerstones. The pursuit of success can feel hollow without support from loved ones.

Take time to cultivate friendships and familial connections. These are the people who can lift your spirits during setbacks or share in your biggest victories. Don’t forget to be human even while striving for greatness.

Balancing dreams with relationships ensures you're climbing a sustainable ladder toward fulfillment.

Examples

• Using weekends to unplug and enjoy quality time with family.
• Leaning on a partner emotionally when setbacks arise instead of withdrawing.
• Prioritizing dinners with friends despite a busy work schedule.

9. Embrace Persistence and Resilience

The road to achieving your dreams will have setbacks. Staying determined even when times get tough is what sets apart those who succeed from those who stop trying.

Keep pushing even when previous attempts fail. Remember the author who faithfully writes to the Pope each year. Acting persistently, without fear of rejection, takes time but brings results. Those who keep knocking on the metaphorical doors are the ones who find them eventually open.

Dreams require sustained effort, even in the face of adversity. Learn to rise after every stumble and remain focused on where you’re headed.

Examples

• Reapplying to a competitive school after being initially denied admission.
• Rewriting a failed novel draft after critique instead of giving up on writing.
• Pitching a business idea ten times until someone offers partnership.

Takeaways

1. Dedicate regular moments to self-analysis to clarify your dreams and motivations.
2. Be fearless and consistent in reaching out for help or knocking on opportunities that seem out of reach.
3. Balance the pursuit of your dreams with nurturing relationships that matter most.