“Darkness cannot put out darkness; only light can do that.” Martin Luther King’s words echo the central theme of Everybody, Always: Love is the light that can transform the world.

1. Love Means Loving Everyone, Not Just Those Close to You

Love is not limited to our family and friends; it must extend to everyone, even those who are difficult to care for. Bob Goff emphasizes that Jesus’s teachings call us to love our neighbors, which includes everyone we encounter in this global "neighborhood."

Goff provides an example of Jesus sharing a meal with Judas, the disciple who would betray Him. This act embodies unconditional love, demonstrating that even those who wrong us deserve affection and kindness.

The author shares a powerful story about a church event in Alabama called a “crop drop.” Various churches united to distribute potatoes to the needy, breaking down their divisive walls to become one body of love and support.

Examples

  • Jesus's love extended to Judas, inspiring us to love those who might even hurt us.
  • A man named Walter greets refugees at the airport with open arms, welcoming them like family.
  • Churches in Alabama came together to help the less fortunate, modeling unity and love.

2. Faith Gives Us Strength During Challenging Times

Faith allows us to trust in the unseen and gives us courage to face obstacles. Goff shares personal stories and inspiring anecdotes that illustrate how trusting in God can lead to remarkable outcomes.

One poignant example is the story of Lex, a blind Paralympic long jumper who relies on the voice of a friend to guide him during his runs. Lex’s faith in his friend mirrors the trust we should put in God. Similarly, Goff recalls a terrifying moment as a pilot when he had to land a plane without confirmation that the landing gear was working, placing faith in God’s guidance.

Goff also highlights how faith transforms tragedy into strength, as seen in his friend Karl. After a paralyzing accident, Karl chose to follow a path of love and faith, eventually working to fight injustices in the attorney general’s office.

Examples

  • Lex, the blind athlete, trusts his friend to win medals, showing the power of faith.
  • Goff's plane landing incident illustrates putting trust in God without all the facts.
  • Paralyzed Karl became a beacon of love and justice, inspired by his faith.

3. Small Steps Make Big Changes in Practicing Love

It’s impossible to flawlessly embody love every second of the day. Instead, Goff suggests starting with manageable steps, like committing to love for just 30 seconds at a time.

During a skydiving lesson with his son, Goff learned the value of focusing on the short term. For the first 30 seconds of the jump, you must obey all instructions perfectly. Similarly, in life, loving others can begin with brief moments of conscious effort, which build into lasting habits.

Goff also discusses the metaphor of cutting strings from a parachute that are out of place. Our faith and love, like a parachute, cannot function properly if even one element is lacking, so it’s necessary to start repairing each “string” that is broken.

Examples

  • Start loving others for just 30 seconds when it seems hard, and gradually expand.
  • Learn from skydiving lessons: no half-measures when it comes to faith and love.
  • Replacing faulty parachute lines symbolizes cutting away harmful behaviors.

4. Love Your Children the Way God Loves Us

Parenting, like faith, works best when rooted in love rather than strict rules. Goff recalls learning how much joy God feels when someone loves His children, and he mirrors this joy as a father of three.

God never forces anyone to follow His path. Instead, He inspires by affirming His children’s identities. For instance, in the Bible, He called Moses a leader and Noah a sailor without dictating their duties. Similarly, Goff recommends helping children flourish by reinforcing their potential instead of merely enforcing rules.

Goff also emphasizes spending quality time with loved ones. His decision to learn skydiving alongside his son exemplifies this value. By actively participating in their lives, we nurture relationships far more effectively than we could through words or commands alone.

Examples

  • God leads with love, affirming identities like "leader" for Moses and "sailor" for Noah.
  • Goff’s skydiving lessons with his son show the importance of shared experience.
  • Parenting should focus on who children are becoming, not just what they must do.

5. Love Is Not a Competition

Acts of love lose purpose when they are treated as achievements to be displayed or tallied for personal pride. Goff encourages doing good for its own sake, motivated by love instead of recognition.

He recalls earning nearly 1,000 prize tickets at a pizza parlor with his kids, only to realize they were worth nothing more than a cheap pencil. Similarly, trying to “score points” with God doesn’t earn us His love because we already have it unconditionally.

Instead, Goff shows how selfless acts of service make a stronger impact. For example, he helped a stranger from jail pay for an ankle bracelet, with no expectations of repayment or acknowledgment. This embodies the joy of being a quiet, supporting actor in others’ stories.

Examples

  • Goff’s pizza parlor tickets became a life lesson about worthless “points.”
  • Helping a stranger get parole showed love beyond expectation or benefit.
  • God’s love is already given; our only task is to love others selflessly.

6. Stop Posing and Act

Words are easy; actions are harder but more meaningful. Goff suggests "putting your money where your mouth is" when it comes to faith and love.

Goff uses the example of a friend named Adrien, an airport ID checker, who treats every angry traveler with patience and kindness. Adrien doesn’t preach love – he demonstrates it through his actions every day, showing that true faith is lived out, not just spoken.

In another story, Goff recalls carrying a real bucket to remind himself to fill it with patience, a virtue he was working on. This playful but effective strategy reinforced his focus on action over hollow promises.

Examples

  • Adrien showed love daily to stressed travelers, embodying kindness in action.
  • Goff carried a bucket to symbolize his commitment to patience.
  • Actions like helping strangers reveal faith more than empty declarations.

7. Forgive Even the Most Hateful

Forgiveness is one of the deepest ways to demonstrate love, even when dealing with unimaginable evil. In Uganda, Goff helped convict a witch doctor who had harmed children, yet he found himself compelled to forgive the man.

Goff’s ability to visit the inmate, offer forgiveness, and share Jesus’s love eventually transformed the man, who began preaching kindness to other prisoners. This unimaginable act of love also inspired Goff to open a school in Uganda for ex-witch doctors, where they learn compassion and literacy.

The ripple effect was extraordinary: graduates of the school went on to save children, proving that forgiveness has the power to change lives.

Examples

  • Goff forgave a convicted witch doctor who harmed children, despite his deeds.
  • The man experienced a spiritual transformation and began preaching love in prison.
  • Ex-witch doctor students from Goff’s school saved the lives of other children.

8. Faith Is a Leap, Not a Guarantee

Faith often demands action without full certainty. Goff argues that trusting God doesn’t mean waiting to have all the “green lights” you desire before making a move.

An example is his airplane landing story, where he trusted without knowing if the landing gear was functional. Faith, Goff explains, provides courage, not guarantees, but it’s only by leaping that we discover God has already prepared the way.

Faith also transforms us over time. Goff shares multiple stories of individuals, from Lex the blind athlete to Karl the paralyzed advocate, who faced adversity and showed how God’s strength helps us endure.

Examples

  • Trusting unseen "green lights" empowers bold decisions.
  • Lex relied on his guide's voice, symbolizing a leap of faith.
  • Faith gave Karl resilience as he built a meaningful life despite paralysis.

9. Kingdoms, Not Castles

Building personal “castles” isolates us, while focusing on God’s "kingdom" brings inclusivity, community, and love for all. Goff contrasts a community that breaks down walls with individuals who construct barriers.

The Alabama churches' potato project exemplifies this lesson, showing what happens when faith communities come together for a shared purpose. Lives are transformed when we see others not as outsiders but as family included in God’s kingdom.

Tearing down walls means embracing vulnerability and connection, not hiding behind self-proclaimed holiness or exclusivity.

Examples

  • Churches uniting in Alabama exemplified lowering their drawbridges of division.
  • Kingdom-building welcomes the marginalized instead of rejecting them.
  • Walt welcoming every refugee as family casts aside defensive "castle" thinking.

Takeaways

  1. Begin small: Commit to acts of love and faith for short periods and expand slowly.
  2. Focus on actions: Show love through deeds, not just promises or words.
  3. Practice forgiveness: Start with minor grievances and grow into forgiving deeper wrongs.

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