How Children Succeed

Introduction

In today's world, parents are constantly searching for ways to give their children the best possible start in life. Many believe that cognitive stimulation is the key to success, leading to a surge in popularity of educational toys, videos, and literature aimed at developing children's intellectual abilities from an early age. However, Paul Tough's book "How Children Succeed" challenges this notion and explores the science behind what truly helps children thrive in life.

This book delves into the various factors that contribute to a child's success, going beyond just cognitive development. Tough examines how childhood experiences, both positive and negative, can shape a child's future. He also investigates the importance of non-cognitive skills, such as perseverance, conscientiousness, and self-discipline, in determining long-term success.

Through extensive research and real-life examples, Tough provides valuable insights for parents, educators, and anyone interested in helping children reach their full potential. Let's explore the key ideas presented in this thought-provoking book.

The Impact of Traumatic Childhood Experiences

One of the central themes in "How Children Succeed" is the lasting impact of traumatic childhood experiences. Tough introduces the concept of the Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) questionnaire, which measures the number of traumatic events a person has experienced during their childhood. These experiences can include direct abuse, emotional neglect, and various forms of household dysfunction.

Long-lasting Consequences

The book reveals that high ACE scores, indicating traumatic childhoods, correlate with a range of behavioral problems later in life. For example:

1. Difficulty concentrating in class
2. Inability to move past disappointments
3. Increased likelihood of engaging in bullying behavior
4. Higher rates of juvenile delinquency

Shockingly, a study of detainees at a juvenile detention center found that 84 percent had experienced at least two serious childhood traumas, with the majority having experienced six or more.

The effects of childhood trauma don't end with adolescence. Tough explains that high ACE scores are also associated with mental and physical health problems in adulthood. These can include:

1. Increased likelihood of engaging in risky behaviors like smoking and drug abuse
2. Higher risk of ischemic heart disease and other chronic disorders

This information highlights the critical importance of providing children with stable, nurturing environments to prevent long-term negative consequences.

The Vulnerability of Children to Stress

Tough delves into the physiological reasons behind why traumatic events have such a profound impact on children. He explains the body's stress reaction, which is governed by the HPA axis (hypothalamic, pituitary, and adrenal structures in the brain). When we encounter stressful events, these structures release hormones that trigger various stress reactions in our body.

Evolutionary Mismatch

While these stress reactions evolved to help us survive short-term dangers, they are ill-suited for the long-term stressors of modern life. Tough points out that our bodies don't differentiate between the stress of fleeing a predator and the stress of financial difficulties. This sustained stress reaction can have serious health consequences, especially for young people.

Impact on the Developing Brain

Children are particularly vulnerable to chronic stress because it takes a significant toll on their prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for self-regulation. This can lead to:

1. Lack of impulse control
2. Increased likelihood of engaging in high-risk behaviors
3. Difficulty in decision-making and problem-solving

The book emphasizes that these effects are especially dangerous during adolescence when there are more opportunities and temptations to engage in risky behaviors like unprotected sex, drug use, or drunk driving. Such behaviors can have drastic, life-altering consequences for young people.

The Power of Attentive Parenting

Despite the grim picture painted by the effects of childhood trauma and stress, Tough offers hope in the form of attentive, nurturing parenting. He presents research showing that even in stressful environments, an attentive mother can almost completely compensate for her child's physiological stress factors.

Secure Attachment

The book introduces the concept of secure attachment, which is considered the healthiest form of parent-child relationship. In this type of attachment:

1. The parent serves as a "safe base" for the child to explore the world
2. Children tend to be more intrepid and self-reliant
3. There's a higher likelihood of graduating from high school
4. Children are more likely to form strong social networks and lead socially competent lives

Tough emphasizes that it's not just about providing material comfort or cognitive stimulation. The emotional connection and responsiveness of parents play a crucial role in a child's development and future success.

Interventions and Therapy

The book also offers hope for parents who may struggle with providing attentive care. Tough discusses interventions and therapy options that can help parents become more sensitive and attentive, thereby creating secure attachments with their children. He cites a study where therapists worked simultaneously with at-risk parents and their infant children to improve attachment relationships and shield them from the adverse effects of trauma.

This information is particularly valuable for parents who may have experienced trauma themselves or who are struggling in high-stress environments. It shows that with the right support and guidance, parents can learn to provide the nurturing care their children need to thrive.

Beyond Intelligence: The Importance of Non-Cognitive Skills

A significant portion of "How Children Succeed" is dedicated to challenging the popular notion that cognitive abilities are the primary predictor of a child's future success. While Tough acknowledges the importance of cognitive skills, he presents compelling evidence for the crucial role of non-cognitive skills in determining life outcomes.

The Cognitive Hypothesis

Tough first explains the prevalent "cognitive hypothesis," which suggests that:

1. Cognitive abilities (like math skills or pattern recognition) are the most powerful predictors of future success
2. These skills are best developed through early cognitive stimulation

This belief has driven the rising demand for early childhood education products and programs. While some studies support this hypothesis, Tough argues that it's only part of the picture.

The Power of Character

The book introduces the idea that non-cognitive skills – often referred to as character traits – play a significant role in future success. These include:

1. Optimism
2. Conscientiousness
3. Curiosity
4. Perseverance
5. Self-discipline

Tough presents several studies supporting this claim. For example:

1. High school graduates do better than dropouts later in life not because of higher intelligence, but due to greater perseverance
2. Participants of a prestigious preschool program showed long-term benefits in areas like curiosity and self-control, even after their initial IQ advantage wore off

This information challenges parents and educators to look beyond academic achievement and cognitive development when considering a child's potential for success.

Key Non-Cognitive Skills for Success

Tough delves deeper into specific non-cognitive skills that have been shown to predict future success. He focuses on three main traits:

1. Perseverance (Grit)

Tough explains that grit – the ability to stick with a task or goal over a long period – is a powerful predictor of success. He cites a study of college students where those with high levels of grit achieved high grade point averages, even if they had entered college with low scores.

2. Conscientiousness

This trait refers to the desire to do one's best and be thorough in tasks, even without external rewards. Tough presents research showing that:

1. Conscientiousness is the best predictor of productive employees in organizational psychology
2. High school students' willingness to focus on boring tasks correlated with their future financial success

3. Self-Discipline

Tough highlights the famous "marshmallow test" study, where children's ability to delay gratification (by not eating a marshmallow immediately) correlated with various positive outcomes later in life, including:

1. Higher SAT scores
2. Fewer health problems
3. Less financial trouble
4. Fewer run-ins with the law

This information provides valuable insight for parents and educators on which traits to foster in children to set them up for future success.

Teaching Character: Lessons from Schools

Tough explores various attempts by schools to teach character traits and non-cognitive skills. He discusses both the failures and successes of these programs, providing valuable lessons for educators and parents.

Early Character Education Programs

The book describes how many U.S. schools in the 1990s began implementing "character education" programs. These programs aimed to teach traits like honesty and respect. However, Tough explains that these efforts were largely unsuccessful because:

1. The ideals were too vague to be of practical use to students
2. Studies found no significant impact on student success

The KIPP Academy Approach

Tough then introduces the KIPP (Knowledge Is Power Program) academy, a New York middle school for low-income families. Despite initial success in teaching academic skills, KIPP found that their character education program wasn't yielding the desired results:

1. Only 21% of their graduates completed a college degree within six years
2. Those who did finish college weren't necessarily the top academic performers, but those with non-cognitive strengths like optimism and resilience

A New Approach to Character Education

Tough describes how KIPP, with the help of psychologist Martin Seligman, developed a new approach focusing on seven specific character strengths:

1. Self-regulation
2. Zest
3. Grit
4. Social intelligence
5. Gratitude
6. Optimism
7. Curiosity

To implement this program, KIPP used a strategy called "message saturation," which involved:

1. Students wearing sweatshirts with slogans like "Infinite character"
2. Posters in classrooms and hallways encouraging self-control and zest
3. Displaying students' "character point average" alongside their GPA

While still in its early stages, this new approach has shown promising results, with KIPP alumni graduation rates doubling.

This section of the book offers valuable insights for schools and parents looking to cultivate important character traits in children. It emphasizes the importance of being specific about which traits to develop and finding practical ways to reinforce these traits in daily life.

The Challenges Faced by Affluent Families

In a surprising turn, Tough addresses the character issues that can affect children from affluent families. This section of the book challenges the assumption that wealth automatically provides the best environment for child development.

Performance Pressure and Emotional Distance

Tough explains that children of affluent families often face unique challenges:

1. High performance pressure from parents
2. Emotionally distant parenting
3. Feelings of shame and hopelessness

These factors can lead to negative consequences, including:

1. Higher rates of drug and alcohol abuse compared to less affluent peers
2. Greater degrees of anxiety and depression

The Perils of "Helicopter Parenting"

Tough introduces the concept of "helicopter parenting," where affluent parents try to protect their children from every possible failure or adversity. This approach can lead to:

1. Overindulgence of children
2. Low tolerance for dealing with adversity
3. Inability to cope with difficult situations later in life

Fear of Failure

The book argues that these parenting approaches often leave children with a permanent fear of failure. Tough provides evidence that this fear persists into adulthood, influencing career choices:

1. Fewer college graduates pursue riskier careers like art or entrepreneurship
2. More opt for safer options like management consulting and investment banking

This information serves as a wake-up call for affluent parents, encouraging them to reconsider their approach to parenting and allow their children to experience and learn from failures and challenges.

The Importance of Learning from Mistakes

Tough presents a compelling case for the importance of allowing children to make mistakes and learn from them. He uses the example of Intermediate School 318 (IS 318) in New York, a public school in a poor neighborhood that has achieved remarkable success in chess competitions.

Confronting Mistakes Head-On

The book describes how Elizabeth Spiegel, who runs the chess program at IS 318, reviews every move her students make in a group setting. This approach:

1. Lauds good strategies
2. Points out bad moves and how they could have been improved
3. Teaches students self-control and cognitive flexibility

Tough emphasizes that this process, while potentially uncomfortable, is crucial for children to gain insight from their mistakes.

Separating Self from Mistakes

The book highlights the importance of teaching children to separate themselves from their mistakes. Spiegel's approach of teaching students that "losing is something you do, not something you are" helps children understand that mistakes are valuable learning opportunities rather than personal failings.

Optimistic vs. Pessimistic Thinking

Tough introduces Professor Martin Seligman's research on how people understand their mistakes:

1. Pessimistic people tend to explain mistakes using the "Three Ps": personal, permanent, and pervasive
2. Optimistic people view mistakes as impersonal, specific, and short-term

The book argues that teaching children to adopt a more optimistic mindset can significantly impact their ability to learn from mistakes and overcome challenges.

The Teachability of Optimism

Importantly, Tough emphasizes that this kind of optimism can be taught. He suggests that character-building programs in schools, like the one at IS 318, can help instill this valuable mindset in children.

This section of the book provides valuable insights for parents and educators on how to help children develop resilience and learn from their mistakes, rather than being discouraged by them.

Final Thoughts: A Holistic Approach to Child Development

As "How Children Succeed" draws to a close, Paul Tough leaves readers with a comprehensive understanding of what truly contributes to a child's success in life. The book challenges conventional wisdom about child development and offers a more nuanced, holistic approach.

Beyond Cognitive Skills

One of the most significant takeaways from the book is the importance of looking beyond cognitive skills when considering a child's potential for success. While intellectual abilities are undoubtedly important, Tough convincingly argues that non-cognitive skills or character traits play an equally, if not more, crucial role in determining life outcomes.

The Role of Adversity

Tough's exploration of childhood trauma and stress highlights the profound impact that early experiences can have on a child's future. However, the book also offers hope by demonstrating how attentive parenting and secure attachments can mitigate these negative effects. This information empowers parents and caregivers to create nurturing environments that can help children overcome even the most challenging circumstances.

Teaching Character

The book's examination of character education programs provides valuable insights for educators and policymakers. Tough's analysis of both unsuccessful and promising approaches to teaching character traits offers a roadmap for schools looking to implement effective character-building initiatives.

The Value of Failure

Perhaps one of the most counterintuitive lessons from the book is the importance of allowing children to experience failure. Tough's exploration of the negative effects of overprotective parenting, particularly in affluent families, serves as a reminder that children need opportunities to face challenges, make mistakes, and learn from them to develop resilience and problem-solving skills.

A Call to Action

"How Children Succeed" serves as a call to action for parents, educators, and policymakers to reconsider our approach to child development. The book encourages a shift in focus from purely academic achievement to a more balanced approach that nurtures both cognitive and non-cognitive skills.

By highlighting the importance of character traits like grit, perseverance, and optimism, Tough challenges us to find ways to foster these qualities in children. He also emphasizes the critical role that supportive relationships and environments play in a child's development, reminding us that success is not just about individual effort but also about the support systems we create for our children.

In conclusion, "How Children Succeed" offers a wealth of information and insights that can help us better understand and support children's development. By taking a more holistic approach that considers both cognitive and non-cognitive factors, we can create environments and opportunities that truly help children succeed in life. The book leaves readers with a sense of hope and empowerment, knowing that with the right approach, we can make a significant positive impact on children's lives and future success.