Introduction
Anne Glenconner's memoir "Lady in Waiting" offers a fascinating glimpse into the world of British royalty through the eyes of someone who spent decades in close proximity to the royal family. As lady-in-waiting to Princess Margaret for over 30 years, Anne had a front-row seat to the glamour, drama, and behind-the-scenes realities of life in the royal circle.
This book provides an intimate, candid, and often surprising account of Princess Margaret's life and personality, as well as Anne's own extraordinary experiences as a member of the British aristocracy. From glittering galas to private moments, from royal tours around the world to quiet days at the palace, Anne shares her unique perspective on a rarified world few ever get to see up close.
With warmth, humor, and remarkable openness, Anne recounts both the highs and lows of her life in royal service - the excitement and privilege as well as the challenges and heartbreaks. She offers insight into the real personalities behind the public facades of famous royals, shares amusing anecdotes from her travels and duties, and reflects on how royal life has changed over the decades she witnessed.
For anyone fascinated by the British royal family, this book provides an unprecedented insider's view from someone who was truly there. Anne's story also stands on its own as a compelling memoir of an eventful life lived adjacent to the crown. Let's dive into the key ideas and revelations from this unique glimpse behind the royal curtain.
The Prestigious World of Royal Courtiers
One of the first things Anne's memoir illuminates is the rarefied world of royal courtiers - the small circle of aristocrats and trusted friends who serve in official capacities to members of the royal family. Far from being mere servants, these courtier positions are highly prestigious roles typically given to individuals from noble families.
Anne explains that courtier titles like equerry, groom of the robes, and lady-in-waiting are often passed down through generations of aristocratic families. Her own father had served as equerry to King George VI, so it wasn't entirely surprising when the young Anne was tapped for an important role in Queen Elizabeth II's coronation.
In 1953, at just 19 years old, Anne received a life-changing telegram informing her that she had been chosen as one of Queen Elizabeth's maids of honor for the upcoming coronation ceremony. This was a huge honor that immediately elevated Anne's status and brought her into the innermost royal circle.
Anne vividly describes the pomp and pageantry of the coronation, where she helped manage Elizabeth's enormous 21-foot embroidered train and kept smelling salts on hand in case the new queen felt faint. For Anne, it was a thrilling introduction to life at the very center of royal events and rituals.
This early experience set the stage for Anne's later role as lady-in-waiting to Princess Margaret. When Margaret asked Anne to take on this position in 1971, it was a natural progression given Anne's aristocratic background and previous royal service.
Anne explains that ladies-in-waiting were not mere servants but trusted companions drawn from the princess's own social circle. They operated on a rotation, taking turns accompanying Margaret to events and anticipating her needs. While the role came with significant prestige, Anne is candid about the fact that many of the day-to-day duties were quite mundane.
The Real Princess Margaret
Perhaps the most fascinating aspect of Anne's memoir is the intimate portrait it paints of Princess Margaret - the glamorous, sometimes controversial younger sister of Queen Elizabeth II. Anne's decades of close friendship with Margaret allow her to show sides of the princess's personality that the public rarely glimpsed.
Anne describes Margaret as a trendsetter and tastemaker who had significant cultural influence, particularly in the swinging London scene of the 1960s and 70s. Margaret moved in artistic and bohemian circles, counting famous creatives like photographer Cecil Beaton and painter Lucian Freud among her friends.
The princess's trendsetting extended to her love of the Caribbean island of Mustique. Anne and her husband had purchased the undeveloped island in 1958, and when Margaret first visited on her honeymoon, she was enchanted. Anne's husband gifted Margaret a plot of land there, and soon the previously rustic island became a chic getaway for the jet set.
Anne shares that Margaret treasured Mustique as an escape from the formality and scrutiny of royal life. There, she could relax, swim, and indulge her passion for shell collecting without press intrusion. Yet even in this laid-back setting, Margaret maintained some royal airs, insisting on being greeted with curtsies and "Ma'am."
While Margaret had a reputation for being vivacious and glamorous, Anne reveals that in private the princess often preferred quiet, routine-driven days at home. Margaret was a creature of habit who enjoyed predictable daily rituals like her 5 pm cup of Earl Grey tea with a specific cookie.
Anne also sheds light on Margaret's romantic life, including her doomed first love with Peter Townsend and her troubled marriage to Antony Armstrong-Jones. She suggests that Margaret never fully got over Townsend, whom she was forbidden to marry due to his divorced status. This may have contributed to the unhappiness in her marriage to Armstrong-Jones, which was marked by his infidelity and hot temper.
The memoir touches on Margaret's controversial relationship with Roddy Llewellyn, a much younger man with whom she found comfort amid her marital woes. Anne was there when the two first met, describing their instant connection and Margaret's playful flirtation. She presents this relationship more sympathetically than the scandalized press coverage of the time.
Throughout, Anne emphasizes Margaret's loyalty as a friend, her sharp sense of humor, and her resilience in the face of personal struggles and health issues later in life. She presents a nuanced view of a complex woman who was both a larger-than-life royal figure and a very human individual with her own joys and sorrows.
The Realities of Royal Life
While much of Anne's account highlights the glamour and excitement of royal life, she's also candid about the more mundane and challenging aspects. Her insider perspective reveals that the day-to-day realities often diverge from public perceptions.
As lady-in-waiting, many of Anne's duties were far from glamorous. She describes having to scope out restroom locations at events and stand guard outside while Margaret used the facilities. She had to memorize Margaret's precise drink preferences for different times of day. At large events, Anne sometimes lost track of the petite princess in the crowd and had to frantically search while maintaining an outward appearance of calm.
Anne emphasizes that royal life involves a grueling schedule of official engagements and strict adherence to protocol. Even on vacation, royals were often surrounded by large entourages of staff. She recounts how at the Royal Lodge in Windsor, evening gatherings in the Queen Mother's apartment required everyone to remain standing as long as she did, even after a long day of activities.
The memoir also highlights how royal protocol and public expectations constrained Margaret's personal life. Her first love was deemed an unsuitable match due to his divorced status. Years later, when Margaret herself sought a divorce from Armstrong-Jones, it caused a major scandal. Anne suggests that these restrictions on Margaret's romantic choices contributed to her unhappiness.
Even seemingly glamorous royal tours came with unexpected challenges. Anne shares amusing anecdotes about having to troubleshoot issues on the fly, like drying Margaret's shoes in a microwave or figuring out how to pin a medal on a shirtless king. She also describes having to step in and complete a tour when Margaret fell ill, facing the disappointment of dignitaries expecting a princess.
Anne's account makes clear that while royal life certainly had its perks and exciting moments, it also involved significant sacrifice of privacy and personal freedom. The constant scrutiny and rigid expectations took their toll, particularly on someone like Margaret who had a more free-spirited nature.
Royal Family Dynamics
Anne's close relationship with Margaret gives her unique insight into the dynamics within the royal family. She describes how Margaret struggled to adjust to life in her sister Elizabeth's shadow after Elizabeth became queen. The coronation that was such an exciting moment for Anne was actually a somber occasion for Margaret, who felt she was losing her sister to the demands of the crown.
The memoir offers glimpses of how the royals interacted in private, away from public view. Anne describes laid-back family picnics and shooting parties where the royals could relax together. She notes how even Queen Elizabeth and Margaret deferred to their mother, the Queen Mother, in private family settings.
Anne shares some of the royal family's private rituals and in-jokes, like the Queen Mother's habit of making coded toasts at dinner - raising her glass above or below the table to indicate whether she approved of the person being toasted. These details humanize the royals, showing their relationships and quirks behind the formal public facade.
The book also touches on the different approaches various royals took to their public roles. Anne contrasts Margaret's more freewheeling style with Elizabeth's dutiful nature. She also discusses the impact of younger royals like Princess Diana, who brought a more informal, emotionally open approach to royal duties.
Royal Tours and Travels
Some of the most entertaining sections of Anne's memoir recount her experiences accompanying Margaret on royal tours around the world. These trips combined glamour and protocol with unexpected mishaps and cultural faux pas.
Anne describes elaborate receptions in far-flung locales, from a cocktail party on the Royal Train in Australia to dinner in the Tower of London surrounded by the crown jewels. She recounts meeting famous figures like Imelda Marcos, who gave her a tour of her infamous shoe collection when Margaret was too ill to attend.
The memoir highlights some of the diplomatic challenges of these tours, like when President Reagan mistook Anne for the princess or when Margaret had to figure out how to pin a medal on the bare chest of an African king. Anne's role often involved smoothing over awkward moments and ensuring all the little details were just right for the princess.
These tours also allowed Margaret to exercise her charm and wit. Anne describes how the princess won over hostile Australian press with a well-timed cocktail party. She also shares Margaret's humorous reactions to some of the more unusual experiences they encountered abroad.
While the tours were often exciting, they could also be grueling. Anne recounts times when Margaret fell ill or struggled with the demanding schedule. She also describes her own nervousness when asked to fill in for the princess at some events, knowing she couldn't quite match Margaret's star power.
Overall, these anecdotes provide a fascinating look at the mix of diplomacy, spectacle, and improvisation involved in royal tours during this era. They showcase both the privileges and pressures of representing the crown on the world stage.
Tragedy and Compassion
While much of Anne's memoir focuses on the glittering world of royalty, she also shares some of the profound personal tragedies she experienced. Her candor about these painful experiences adds depth to the narrative and highlights a more compassionate side of the royal family.
Anne writes movingly about the death of her eldest son Charlie from heroin addiction and the AIDS diagnosis of another son, Henry. She describes the isolation and stigma her family faced during Henry's illness, at a time when AIDS was poorly understood and feared.
It's in recounting these difficult times that Anne's affection for Princess Margaret and other royals really shines through. She shares how Margaret and Princess Diana both visited Henry privately during his final days, showing great kindness and helping to combat the stigma around AIDS.
Anne highlights the important public work both princesses did to destigmatize AIDS and promote sexual health awareness. She notes that Margaret was actually involved in AIDS charities even before Diana's more famous advocacy, establishing a hospice and becoming a patron for the Terrence Higgins Trust.
These sections of the memoir reveal a more serious side to Margaret beyond her party-girl image. They also underscore how the royal family's advocacy could have meaningful impact on social issues, both publicly and through private acts of compassion.
Margaret's Later Years
The final portions of Anne's memoir deal with Princess Margaret's declining health and the last years of her life. She describes how Margaret's lifelong smoking habit caught up with her, leading to part of her lung being removed in 1985 and a series of debilitating strokes in the 1990s.
Anne provides an intimate, sometimes difficult account of Margaret's struggles during this period. She recounts a particularly bad episode in Mustique when Margaret became depressed and refused to leave her darkened room for days. Yet she also shares moments of the princess's resilience and humor, like her amusement at the Blairs jogging around Balmoral in bright lycra outfits during her convalescence there.
Throughout Margaret's health battles, Anne emphasizes how the princess's essential personality - her wit, her love of routine, her regal bearing - remained intact. Even as her physical capabilities diminished, Margaret maintained her distinctive charm and sense of self.
Anne was with Margaret through many of these difficult times, showcasing the depth of their friendship beyond the official lady-in-waiting role. Her account provides a poignant look at how someone so vibrant and larger-than-life coped with the indignities of aging and illness.
The memoir concludes with Margaret's death in 2002 at the age of 71. Anne's reflections on her friend's passing and legacy are touching, emphasizing Margaret's loyalty, humor, and complexity as an individual beyond her royal status.
Changing Times for the Monarchy
Woven throughout Anne's memoir is a sense of how the monarchy and its relationship to British society evolved over the decades she witnessed. Having served at Elizabeth's coronation in the 1950s and remained close to the royal family into the early 2000s, Anne had a front-row seat to significant changes.
She describes how the younger generation of royals like Princess Diana brought a more informal, emotionally open approach that contrasted with the old-school reserve of the Queen and Margaret's generation. Anne notes both positive and negative effects of this shift, appreciating the greater connectedness with the public while also lamenting some loss of mystique.
The memoir touches on how media scrutiny of the royals intensified over time, particularly around Margaret's personal life. Anne suggests this growing pressure and loss of privacy took a toll on Margaret and made it harder for her to balance her royal role with her more freewheeling personality.
Anne also reflects on changing social mores and how they impacted the royal family. She notes how attitudes around divorce evolved, from Margaret being forbidden to marry a divorcé in the 1950s to her own divorce in the 1970s being somewhat more accepted (though still scandalous). The gradual destigmatization of AIDS is another social shift Anne witnesses through her royal connections.
While not overtly critical, Anne's account does highlight some ways the monarchy struggled to adapt to changing times. Her insider perspective offers a nuanced look at an institution balancing tradition and modernization during a period of significant social change.
Final Thoughts
Anne Glenconner's "Lady in Waiting" provides a captivating glimpse into a rarefied world few ever see up close. Through her eyes, we get to know Princess Margaret as a complex, witty, and sometimes difficult woman who was both larger-than-life and very human. We also gain insight into the realities of royal life - the glamour and privilege as well as the constraints and challenges.
What makes Anne's account particularly compelling is her ability to bridge different worlds. As an aristocrat and royal insider, she understands the traditions and protocols of the monarchy. But she also has an outsider's perspective that allows her to view some of the more arcane aspects of royal life with gentle humor and occasional critique.
Her decades of experience give her a long view of how the monarchy evolved over the latter half of the 20th century. From the pageantry of Elizabeth's coronation to the more turbulent years of royal divorces and scandals, Anne witnessed major shifts in how the royal family operated and was perceived by the public.
Throughout the memoir, Anne comes across as a loyal friend and discreet confidante. While she shares many insider stories and revelations, there's a sense that she's still protecting some of the royal family's privacy. Her affection for Margaret and other royals is clear, but she doesn't shy away from acknowledging their flaws and struggles.
Ultimately, "Lady in Waiting" succeeds in humanizing its royal subjects while still conveying the unique, rarefied nature of their world. It's a story of friendship, duty, and resilience set against a backdrop of tremendous privilege and scrutiny. Anne's warmth and humor make her an engaging narrator, guiding readers through the glittering parties and quiet private moments of life adjacent to the crown.
For royal watchers, the book offers a treasure trove of new insights and behind-the-scenes details about famous figures and events. But even for those less versed in royal lore, it stands as a compelling memoir of an extraordinary life lived in proximity to power and pageantry. Anne's story reminds us that behind the tiaras and titles, the royal family consists of real people navigating relationships, personal struggles, and the weight of tradition and duty.
As the monarchy continues to evolve in the 21st century, accounts like Anne's serve as valuable records of a vanishing world. They help us understand the institution's history and the personalities that shaped it, offering context for its present and future. "Lady in Waiting" thus stands as both an entertaining collection of royal anecdotes and a significant contribution to our understanding of modern British history and culture.
In sharing her remarkable experiences with candor and grace, Anne Glenconner has produced a memoir that is by turns fascinating, touching, and illuminating. It's a fitting tribute to her decades of service and friendship to Princess Margaret, and a valuable portrait of life lived adjacent to the crown. For anyone interested in the human stories behind the royal headlines, "Lady in Waiting" offers a uniquely intimate and engaging perspective on a world that continues to captivate the public imagination.