Lady in Waiting Summary

Being a lady-in-waiting is not just about glamour and privilege; it’s about loyalty, adaptability, and navigating the complexities of royal life.

1. The Role of a Courtier: Prestige and Tradition

Courtiers are not mere servants; they are trusted confidantes chosen from noble families. Their roles, such as equerries, grooms of the robes, and ladies-in-waiting, carry significant prestige and are often passed down through generations. Anne Glenconner’s life changed forever when she was selected as one of Queen Elizabeth II’s maids of honor for the 1953 coronation, a role that symbolized her family’s deep ties to the monarchy.

Anne’s duties during the coronation were both ceremonial and practical. She helped manage the Queen’s 21-foot-long train and carried smelling salts in case the Queen felt faint. This event marked the beginning of Anne’s lifelong connection to the royal family. Her father’s role as equerry to King George VI had already set the stage for her involvement in royal life.

The coronation was a grand affair, but it also highlighted the emotional toll of royal duty. Princess Margaret, the Queen’s younger sister, felt overshadowed and isolated as her sister ascended to the throne. This moment foreshadowed Margaret’s lifelong struggle to find her place in the royal family.

Examples

• Anne’s selection as maid of honor was a continuation of her family’s royal service.
• The coronation was the first to be televised, watched by millions worldwide.
• Princess Margaret’s visible sadness during the event hinted at her future challenges.

2. Princess Margaret: A Trendsetter Beyond Royal Circles

Princess Margaret was more than just a royal; she was a cultural icon who influenced fashion, art, and lifestyle. Her rebellious spirit and bohemian circle of friends, including artists like Lucian Freud and Mick Jagger, set her apart from her more traditional sister, Queen Elizabeth II.

Margaret’s love for the Caribbean island of Mustique exemplified her unique style. Gifted a plot of land there by Anne’s husband, Colin, Margaret transformed the island into a glamorous retreat. Her villa, designed by Oliver Messel, became a hub for aristocrats and celebrities, turning Mustique into a sought-after destination.

Margaret’s influence extended beyond her social circle. Her ability to blend royal propriety with a modern, bohemian lifestyle made her a tastemaker. Even today, Mustique remains a symbol of luxury and exclusivity, thanks to Margaret’s vision.

Examples

• Margaret’s friendships with artists and musicians reflected her bohemian spirit.
• Mustique’s transformation into a luxury destination began with Margaret’s villa.
• Celebrities like David Bowie and Mick Jagger followed Margaret’s lead in making Mustique their retreat.

3. The Reality of Royal Life: Glamour Meets Mundanity

While the title of lady-in-waiting sounds glamorous, the reality is often mundane. Anne Glenconner’s role required her to manage Princess Margaret’s needs during official events and private moments, from locating restrooms to ensuring the princess’s favorite drinks were available.

Anne’s duties extended to managing Margaret’s wardrobe and even drying her shoes in a microwave during a rainy event. Despite the challenges, Anne maintained a calm demeanor, a requirement for anyone in royal service. Her ability to adapt to unexpected situations was key to her success.

Margaret’s private life was more routine than her public persona suggested. She enjoyed simple pleasures like prawn cocktails and Earl Grey tea, finding solace in the predictability of her home life. This contrast between public glamour and private simplicity defined much of royal life.

Examples

• Anne’s role included practical tasks like finding restrooms and managing drinks.
• Margaret’s routine at Kensington Palace reflected her preference for simplicity.
• Anne’s quick thinking saved the day during events like the Melbourne races.

4. Love and Loss: The Constraints of Royal Protocol

Princess Margaret’s romantic life was deeply affected by royal rules. Her first love, Peter Townsend, was deemed unsuitable because he was divorced. This heartbreak influenced her later relationships, including her troubled marriage to Anthony Armstrong Jones.

Margaret’s marriage to Anthony was marked by infidelity and unhappiness. When Anthony’s mistress became pregnant, Margaret took the unprecedented step of filing for divorce. This decision was scandalous at the time but reflected her growing independence.

Margaret’s long-term relationship with Roddy Llewellyn, a man 17 years her junior, was another example of her defiance of royal expectations. Despite the challenges, Margaret’s relationships revealed her resilience and desire for personal happiness.

Examples

• Margaret’s love for Peter Townsend was thwarted by royal protocol.
• Her divorce from Anthony Armstrong Jones was a groundbreaking move for a royal.
• Margaret’s relationship with Roddy Llewellyn showed her willingness to defy expectations.

5. The Challenges of Royal Tours

Royal tours offered both excitement and unexpected challenges. Anne Glenconner accompanied Princess Margaret on many international trips, where she had to navigate cultural differences and logistical issues.

During a tour of Australia, Margaret charmed the press despite the negative headlines about her marriage. In the Philippines, Anne had to manage Imelda Marcos’s disappointment when Margaret couldn’t attend an event. These experiences highlighted the unpredictability of royal duties.

Anne’s quick thinking often saved the day, such as when she ensured the King of Swaziland wore a sash for a medal ceremony. These moments demonstrated the adaptability required for royal service.

Examples

• Margaret’s charm won over the press during the Australian tour.
• Anne managed cultural sensitivities during a visit to the Philippines.
• A last-minute adjustment ensured a successful medal ceremony in Swaziland.

6. Relaxation and Family Time: A Different Side of Royal Life

When off-duty, Princess Margaret enjoyed simple pleasures with her family. Picnics, walks, and pheasant hunts were common activities during vacations at Windsor’s Royal Lodge.

Despite the informality, royal protocol still influenced these moments. For example, guests had to stand while the Queen Mother watched TV. Margaret’s ability to balance tradition with relaxation made these gatherings unique.

Margaret also organized spontaneous outings, such as a dinner at the Tower of London. These moments revealed her playful side and her desire to create memorable experiences for those around her.

Examples

• Family picnics at Windsor included both simplicity and royal formality.
• Guests stood while the Queen Mother watched her favorite TV show.
• Margaret’s spontaneous outings added excitement to family vacations.

7. The Royals and AIDS: Compassion in Action

The British royal family played a significant role in destigmatizing AIDS. Princess Margaret and Princess Diana both supported AIDS charities and visited patients, challenging public misconceptions about the disease.

Anne Glenconner’s son Henry was diagnosed with AIDS in 1986. Both Margaret and Diana provided personal support, visiting Henry during his illness. Their actions demonstrated the royals’ commitment to compassion and social change.

Margaret’s patronage of the Terrence Higgins Trust and Diana’s public embrace of AIDS patients helped shift public attitudes. These efforts showed the human side of the royal family.

Examples

• Margaret and Diana supported AIDS charities and visited patients.
• Margaret’s patronage of the Terrence Higgins Trust highlighted her advocacy.
• Diana’s embrace of AIDS patients challenged public fears and stigma.

8. Margaret’s Declining Health and Unwavering Spirit

In her later years, Princess Margaret faced health challenges, including strokes and depression. Despite these difficulties, she retained her sense of humor and resilience.

Margaret’s recovery at Balmoral included moments of levity, such as watching the Blairs jog in bright lycra. These moments reflected her ability to find joy even in difficult times.

Her death in 2002 marked the end of an era. Margaret was remembered as a glamorous, independent royal who left a lasting legacy.

Examples

• Margaret’s strokes and depression marked her later years.
• Her humor shone through during her recovery at Balmoral.
• Her death was a moment of reflection on her unique role in the royal family.

9. A Legacy of Glamour and Independence

Princess Margaret’s life was a blend of tradition and modernity. She embraced her royal duties while also pushing boundaries, from her fashion choices to her personal relationships.

Her influence extended beyond her lifetime, shaping perceptions of what it means to be a modern royal. Margaret’s ability to balance duty with individuality made her a role model for future generations.

Anne Glenconner’s memoir captures the complexity of Margaret’s life, offering a nuanced portrait of a woman who was both a princess and a trailblazer.

Examples

• Margaret’s fashion and lifestyle choices set trends.
• Her defiance of royal protocol paved the way for future changes.
• Anne’s memoir highlights Margaret’s multifaceted personality.

Takeaways

1. Embrace adaptability in your daily life, just as Anne Glenconner did in her role as lady-in-waiting.
2. Find ways to balance tradition with individuality, taking inspiration from Princess Margaret’s life.
3. Show compassion and challenge stigma, following the example of the royal family’s work with AIDS patients.