Introduction
Oliver Sacks was a renowned neurologist and bestselling author who captivated millions of readers with his fascinating case studies of patients with unusual neurological conditions. In his memoir "On the Move," Sacks provides an intimate look at his own life story - one filled with scientific curiosity, literary passion, and a fair share of personal struggles and adventures.
Born in London in 1933, Sacks grew up with a love of both science and storytelling. As a child, he conducted hazardous chemistry experiments at home while also devouring classic literature. This dual interest in science and narrative would shape his entire career and writing style.
But Sacks' path to becoming a celebrated author-neurologist was far from straightforward. His memoir reveals the ups and downs of his life journey - from his difficult relationship with his sexuality, to his struggles with drug addiction, to his eventual discovery of his true calling in combining medicine and writing.
Through vivid anecdotes and honest reflections, Sacks paints a portrait of himself as a brilliant but often troubled man who ultimately found his way to a fulfilling life's work. His story provides insight into the development of his unique approach to neurology and medical writing - one that emphasized the human experiences behind neurological cases.
"On the Move" takes readers on a journey through Sacks' formative experiences and the events that shaped him into the beloved writer and doctor he became. It's a tale of intellectual curiosity, personal growth, and the fusion of science and storytelling that defined Sacks' career and legacy.
Early Life and Education
A Prophetic School Report
When Oliver Sacks was 12 years old, one of his teachers wrote a prescient comment on his school report: "Sacks will go far, if he does not go too far." This statement neatly encapsulated the mix of promise and risk that characterized much of Sacks' early life.
As a child, Sacks displayed an intense curiosity about science, particularly chemistry. He would conduct potentially dangerous experiments at home, filling the house with noxious fumes. While this hobby reflected his budding scientific interests and foreshadowed his future medical career, it also demonstrated a tendency to push boundaries that would persist throughout his life.
A Love of Literature
Although science was a major interest, Sacks also developed a deep love of literature from an early age. His mother spent hours reading classic British authors like D.H. Lawrence, Anthony Trollope, and Charles Dickens to him. As he grew older, Sacks explored American novels and narrative-driven science books like Darwin's "Voyage of the Beagle."
This dual passion for science and storytelling would become a defining feature of Sacks' later career as a writer-neurologist. As a teenager, he became president of his secondary school's literary society, showing early signs of his literary inclinations.
An Adventurous Spirit
Sacks' youthful adventures sometimes verged on recklessness. At age 17, he went on a solo cross-country skiing trip in Norway. On the ferry ride back to England, he purchased two large bottles of strong aquavit from the duty-free shop.
When customs informed him he could only bring one bottle into the UK, Sacks decided to drink an entire bottle on the ferry to avoid having it confiscated. Absorbed in reading James Joyce's "Ulysses," he didn't notice how drunk he was becoming until he tried to stand up and fell flat on his face.
This incident illustrates Sacks' early tendencies toward risk-taking and his ability to become completely engrossed in literature - traits that would persist throughout his life.
University Years
At 18, Sacks entered Oxford University on a scholarship to study medicine. His undergraduate years were marked by both academic achievements and personal struggles.
Sacks initially struggled with exams focused on factual recall, ranking near the bottom of his class in anatomy. However, he excelled at essay writing, winning the prestigious Theodore Williams Scholarship in Human Anatomy with a creatively argued essay - despite stumbling into the exam room drunk and late.
It was during this time that Sacks also grappled with his sexuality. In a painful incident, his parents confronted him about his attraction to men. His mother's harsh reaction - telling him he was "an abomination" - left a deep wound that affected Sacks' relationship with his sexuality for most of his life.
Despite these personal challenges, Sacks completed his undergraduate degree in physiology and biology, followed by a medical degree from Oxford. However, he remained uncertain about his career path and felt pressured by his doctor parents to follow in their footsteps.
Early Career and California Years
Moving to America
After completing his medical education in Britain, Sacks decided to relocate to the United States. This move was motivated partly by a desire to avoid the British military draft and partly by the oversaturated job market for doctors in the UK.
At 28, Sacks found himself in San Francisco, completing an internship at Mount Zion Hospital. But his life outside of work took on a dramatically different character.
The Biker "Wolf"
In his free time, Sacks adopted an alter ego of sorts. Donning a black leather jacket and going by his middle name "Wolf," he became an avid motorcyclist. He purchased a Norton Atlas motorcycle and later upgraded to a BMW R69, embarking on extensive road trips across the American West.
Over the next couple of years, Sacks would put over 100,000 miles on his bike, even undertaking a cross-country trip from California to New York and back. During these adventures, he befriended an eclectic mix of people, including Southern truckers and members of the Hells Angels motorcycle club, for whom he became an informal medical consultant.
Bodybuilding and New Relationships
When not on his motorcycle, Sacks spent much of his free time at San Francisco's Central YMCA gym, pursuing bodybuilding with the same intensity he applied to his other interests. His dedication paid off when he set a California state record for squatting, lifting a 600-pound bar.
It was at the gym that Sacks met Mel, a 19-year-old Navy sailor. Their relationship was complex - platonic but intimate, with an undercurrent of unacknowledged attraction. They worked out together, went on motorcycle rides and camping trips, and even engaged in wrestling matches during their gym sessions. While Sacks didn't pursue a sexual relationship, he began to fantasize about a future with Mel.
Move to Los Angeles
In 1962, Sacks secured a residency in neurology at UCLA, and he and Mel moved to Los Angeles together. There, Sacks became immersed in the bodybuilding scene at Venice's famous Muscle Beach. He made colorful new acquaintances, including a weightlifting mathematician who enjoyed playing chess against supercomputers while on LSD.
Experimenting with Drugs
The 1960s counterculture was in full swing in California, and Sacks, with his natural curiosity about consciousness and the workings of the mind, began experimenting with various psychoactive substances. He tried LSD, morning glory seeds, cannabis, and amphetamines, initially approaching these experiences with a mix of scientific interest and recreational curiosity.
However, what started as experimentation would eventually lead Sacks down a dangerous path of addiction, particularly to amphetamines.
A Painful Rejection
Sacks' time in California took a dark turn following an incident with Mel. During one of their massage sessions, which were often erotically charged for Sacks, he was unable to control his physical response and ejaculated on Mel's back. Mel reacted with silent rejection, moving out the next day.
This experience devastated Sacks, leading him to believe he would never have a fulfilling love life. He retreated to an isolated house in Topanga Canyon, sinking into depression and turning increasingly to drugs to numb his emotional pain.
Descent into Addiction
What had begun as recreational drug use transformed into a serious addiction, particularly to amphetamines. Sacks found himself needing larger and larger doses to achieve the same euphoric effects. He stopped eating and sleeping regularly, consumed by his drug use.
Sacks likened himself to rats in a scientific experiment he had read about, where the animals became so obsessed with stimulating the pleasure centers in their brains that they pushed a lever repeatedly until they died of exhaustion. He felt trapped in a similar cycle of compulsive behavior.
His drug use escalated from smoking amphetamine-laced marijuana to intravenous methamphetamine use. Despite still being employed at UCLA and having the opportunity to continue his research there, Sacks felt he was losing himself to an "easy, sleazy" California lifestyle.
A Decision to Change
Recognizing that he was on a destructive path, Sacks made a pivotal decision. In September 1965, at the age of 32, he moved to New York City. This relocation was an attempt to leave behind his troubled California years and refocus on his medical career and larger ambitions.
Sacks hoped that this major life change would allow him to break free from his addictions and find his true calling in the medical field. However, as he would soon discover, geographic changes alone would not be enough to solve his deep-seated problems.
Struggles in New York
A Rocky Start
Sacks' move to New York did not immediately solve his problems. In fact, his first few months in the city were marked by continued drug use and mounting professional disappointments.
Two months after his arrival, Sacks experienced a terrifying episode of drug-induced hallucinations. While sitting in a cafe, he saw his coffee change colors and perceived other patrons as having grotesquely distorted features. In a panic, he fled onto a bus, where he hallucinated that all the passengers had egg-shaped heads and insect-like eyes.
This frightening experience was a result of withdrawal from chloral hydrate, a sedative he had been using to counteract the effects of his daily amphetamine use. The incident highlighted the severity of his drug dependency and the toll it was taking on his mental state.
Career Setbacks
Professionally, Sacks was also struggling. He had come to New York for a research fellowship at the Albert Einstein College of Medicine, but it quickly turned into a disaster. His inherent clumsiness and tendency to lose things began to interfere with his work.
In one incident, his lab notebook containing all his research notes fell off the back of his motorcycle on the Cross Bronx Expressway. Unable to retrieve it due to heavy traffic, he watched helplessly as it was shredded by passing vehicles.
In the lab, Sacks gained a reputation for messiness, often spilling food crumbs around his workspace. The final straw came when he lost a crucial myelin sample that had taken ten months to collect. His supervisors convened a meeting and told him he was a "menace" to the lab, suggesting he might be better suited for clinical work rather than research.
Rock Bottom
By December 1965, Sacks' drug habit was severely impacting his life. He was missing work and losing weight at an alarming rate, dropping nearly 80 pounds in just three months. Looking in the mirror, he could barely recognize his gaunt face.
On New Year's Eve, in the midst of an amphetamine-induced euphoria, Sacks had a sobering realization: if he didn't get help, he might not live to see another New Year's Day.
Recognizing the depth of his problems, Sacks began seeing a psychoanalyst, Dr. Shengold. However, the analyst made it clear that therapy would be ineffective until Sacks stopped using drugs.
Finding His Calling
A New Direction
Realizing that he needed meaningful work to help him overcome his addiction, Sacks decided to shift his focus from research to clinical practice. In October 1966, he secured a job as a neurologist at a headache clinic in the Bronx, working with migraine patients.
This career move proved to be a turning point. Sacks found himself deeply engaged with his patients and fascinated by their conditions. He observed how each patient's migraines were uniquely tied to their individual circumstances and personalities.
For instance, one patient, a mathematician, experienced migraines in a weekly cycle that seemed linked to periods of heightened creativity. Another patient's Sunday migraines appeared to be unconsciously motivated by a desire for family attention.
The Birth of a Writer
Sacks' work at the headache clinic not only provided him with a sense of purpose but also sparked his writing career. In February 1967, he had an epiphany: he should write a book about migraines, detailing the extraordinary cases he was encountering at the clinic.
This moment marked a significant turning point in Sacks' life. He envisioned a future where he could combine meaningful clinical work with writing, finally finding his true calling. From that day forward, Sacks never used amphetamines again.
Writing His First Book
In the summer of 1967, during a vacation in England, Sacks experienced a burst of creativity. He wrote the first draft of his migraine book in just a couple of weeks, with the words seeming to pour out of him.
However, when he returned to the headache clinic in the Bronx, he faced a major obstacle. His supervisor, Dr. Arnold P. Friedman, an established authority in migraine studies, strongly disapproved of Sacks writing a book on the subject. Dr. Friedman viewed Sacks as a presumptuous newcomer who didn't know his place in the medical hierarchy.
Conflict and Consequences
Dr. Friedman attempted to undermine Sacks' book by confiscating his patient observation notes and threatening to fire him and blacklist him from neurology in the US if he pursued publication. As the chair of the headache section of the American Neurological Association, Dr. Friedman's threats carried significant weight.
Despite pressure from his parents to back down, Sacks ultimately decided to proceed with his book. He secretly copied his confiscated notes by sneaking into the clinic at night. When he informed Dr. Friedman that he was going to England to finish his book, he was promptly fired.
A New Chapter Begins
Although being fired was a setback, Sacks felt a sense of relief. He was now free to complete his book without interference. He had already secured a publishing deal with Faber & Faber in Britain.
However, true to his perfectionist nature, Sacks decided to completely rewrite the manuscript. After another burst of creativity, his book "Migraine" was finally published in January 1971. It received positive reviews in prestigious British publications, marking the beginning of Sacks' career as both an acclaimed writer and a practicing neurologist.
Developing as a Writer
A Unique Writing Style
Sacks' first book, "Migraine," set the tone for his future works. He adopted a writing style that was unusual for medical literature of the time. Rather than producing dry, academic texts, Sacks wrote narrative-driven accounts that focused on the human experiences behind neurological cases.
This approach was inspired by 19th-century medical case studies, which the medical establishment of Sacks' time considered old-fashioned. However, Sacks believed these older studies possessed a valuable human element that was missing from contemporary medical texts and practices.
The Compulsive Rewriter
While Sacks had found his calling, his writing process was far from smooth. He developed a habit of compulsive rewriting and last-minute additions that would characterize much of his future work.
His second book, "Awakenings," published in 1973, was an even greater success than his debut. However, after submitting the manuscript, Sacks insisted on adding footnotes, fearing the book would be ruined without them. He ended up writing 400 footnotes, creating a text three times longer than the actual book.
An Essential Partnership
Fortunately, Sacks found a skilled editor in Colin Haycraft, who could keep his tendency for endless revisions in check. For "Awakenings," Colin insisted that Sacks pare down his 400 footnotes to a modest 12. He even refused to let Sacks see the galley proofs, fearing further changes and additions.
This partnership continued over the next 13 years as Sacks wrote his subsequent books, including "The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat" and "A Leg to Stand On." The latter, based on Sacks' experience recovering from a leg injury, initially came in at a staggering 300,000 words. Colin insisted on reducing it to one-fifth of its original length.
Life Imitating Art
In a twist of fate that seemed almost too perfect, Sacks injured his leg again shortly after finishing "A Leg to Stand On." He slipped on ice at a gas station and broke his leg, prompting his editor to exclaim, "Oliver! You'd do anything for a footnote."
This incident humorously highlighted how Sacks' life and work were often intertwined, with his personal experiences frequently finding their way into his writings.
Later Career and Legacy
Continued Success
Following the success of his early books, Sacks went on to have a prolific career as both a writer and a neurologist. He wrote more than a dozen books over the course of his life, while continuing to work in various hospitals and clinics in New York City.
Sacks specialized in treating and studying patients with unusual neurological conditions. One of his most famous works, "Awakenings," detailed his experiences treating patients with encephalitis lethargica, or "sleepy sickness," at Beth Abraham Hospital in the Bronx. Using an experimental drug called L-DOPA, Sacks managed to temporarily "awaken" many of these patients who had been in a state between sleep and wakefulness for decades.
A New Approach to Medical Writing
Sacks' books stood out for their narrative style and focus on the human experience of neurological conditions. Rather than presenting dry case studies, he described his patients' experiences, personalities, and stories in rich detail. His writing often read more like literature than traditional medical texts.
This approach was revolutionary in the field of medical writing. Sacks helped to revive a more humanistic style of case study that had fallen out of favor in the medical establishment. His work bridged the gap between scientific understanding and human experience, making complex neurological concepts accessible to a general audience.
Awards and Recognition
Over the years, Sacks received numerous awards and honors for his contributions to both medicine and literature. He was awarded several honorary doctorates and was made a Commander of the Order of the British Empire (CBE) in 2008 for his services to medicine.
His book "Awakenings" was adapted into an Academy Award-nominated film starring Robin Williams and Robert De Niro, further spreading Sacks' work to a wider audience.
Personal Growth
While Sacks found professional success relatively early in his writing career, his personal life took longer to settle. He remained celibate for 35 years after his experiences in California, focusing entirely on his work.
However, in his later years, Sacks found personal happiness. In 2008, at the age of 75, he entered into a relationship with writer and photographer Billy Hayes. This relationship, which lasted until Sacks' death in 2015, brought him a sense of contentment and companionship that had eluded him for much of his life.
Final Years and Lasting Impact
In February 2015, Sacks announced in a New York Times op-ed that he had terminal cancer. With characteristic openness and eloquence, he wrote about facing his impending death, expressing gratitude for the life he had lived and the work he had done.
Sacks passed away on August 30, 2015, at the age of 82. His death was mourned by the scientific community, literary world, and countless readers who had been touched by his work.
Oliver Sacks left behind a rich legacy. His unique approach to neurology and medical writing influenced generations of doctors and writers. He humanized neurological conditions, helping both medical professionals and the general public to see the individuals behind the diagnoses.
Moreover, Sacks' own life story, as recounted in "On the Move" and his other autobiographical works, serves as an inspiring tale of perseverance, intellectual curiosity, and the power of finding one's true calling. Despite early struggles with addiction and self-doubt, Sacks ultimately forged a path that allowed him to combine his passions for science, storytelling, and human understanding.
In the end, Oliver Sacks did indeed "go far," just as his childhood teacher predicted. But he also showed that sometimes, going "too far" - pushing boundaries, taking risks, and forging new paths - can lead to extraordinary achievements and a truly remarkable life.
Conclusion
"On the Move" provides a candid and compelling look at the life of Oliver Sacks, a man whose personal journey was as fascinating as the neurological cases he wrote about. From his early struggles with sexuality and drug addiction to his eventual success as a pioneering neurologist and bestselling author, Sacks' memoir reveals the human story behind his scientific and literary achievements.
Several key themes emerge from Sacks' life story:
The power of perseverance: Despite numerous setbacks and personal struggles, Sacks never gave up on his passion for understanding the human mind and sharing that understanding with others.
The importance of finding one's calling: It wasn't until Sacks combined his love of science with his talent for storytelling that he truly found his place in the world.
The value of a humanistic approach to medicine: Sacks' focus on the individual experiences of his patients revolutionized medical writing and influenced how many doctors approach patient care.
The complexity of human nature: Sacks' own life demonstrates how a person can be brilliant and troubled, risk-taking and introspective, scientific and artistic all at once.
The healing power of work and passion: For Sacks, meaningful work was key to overcoming his personal demons and finding fulfillment in life.
Through his books, Sacks invited readers into the fascinating world of neurology, presenting complex scientific concepts in accessible, human terms. But perhaps more importantly, he showed us the dignity, resilience, and uniqueness of individuals living with neurological conditions.
"On the Move" adds another layer to our understanding of Sacks by revealing the personal experiences that shaped his perspective and drove his work. It's a reminder that behind every great achievement lies a very human story of struggle, growth, and discovery.
Oliver Sacks' legacy extends far beyond his contributions to neurology and literature. He showed us the importance of curiosity, empathy, and perseverance in both professional and personal life. He demonstrated how science and storytelling could be powerfully combined to increase understanding and compassion.
In the end, Sacks' life story, like the patient stories he so skillfully told, reminds us of the incredible complexity and resilience of the human mind and spirit. It encourages us to look beyond surface diagnoses - whether medical or personal - to see the unique individual beneath. And it inspires us to pursue our passions, overcome our struggles, and find ways to contribute meaningfully to the world, just as Sacks himself did throughout his remarkable life.