Introduction

In today's world of selfies, social media, and constant self-promotion, it's easy to forget that there was a time when society valued different qualities in its members. David Brooks' book "The Road to Character" explores this shift in societal values and offers a compelling argument for why we should reconsider our current obsession with the self.

Brooks takes us on a journey through history, philosophy, and personal stories to illustrate how our culture has moved away from valuing virtues like honesty, humility, and faithfulness. He argues that this shift has left us feeling unfulfilled and disconnected from what truly matters in life.

The Two Adams: Understanding Our Dual Nature

Brooks introduces the concept of two competing personality types within each person, which he calls "Adam I" and "Adam II." This idea draws from a long history of philosophical thought about the multiple facets of human nature.

Adam I: The Extrovert

Adam I represents the outward-facing, success-driven part of our personality. This is the side of us that:

  • Seeks career advancement and social status
  • Thrives in a competitive environment
  • Focuses on winning and achieving goals
  • Is comfortable in today's success-obsessed society

Adam II: The Introvert

Adam II, on the other hand, embodies our inner moral compass and strives for personal growth and virtue. This side of us:

  • Values kindness, bravery, honesty, and devotion
  • Seeks to become a better person
  • Is often overshadowed in today's society
  • Represents the core of what makes us human

The Shift in Societal Values

Brooks argues that American society has undergone a significant shift in recent decades, moving from a culture that emphasized Adam II traits to one that celebrates Adam I characteristics.

The Age of Humility

In the past, public figures often downplayed their own importance and emphasized humility. Brooks gives the example of George Bush Sr., who would cross out the word "I" in his campaign speeches to avoid self-promotion.

The Rise of Self-Obsession

Today's culture pushes us to focus on ourselves and our desires above all else. This message is prevalent in various forms of media, from movies to self-help books to celebrity speeches. The common themes are:

  • You're unique and special
  • Follow your dreams
  • Don't accept limits
  • Never change who you are

The Historical Context of This Shift

To understand how we arrived at our current state, Brooks takes us through a brief history of societal values.

The Era of Weakness and Humility

In earlier times, society emphasized human weakness and the importance of humility:

  • Christian thinkers like Augustine rejected worldly success and focused on human sin and error
  • Humanists stressed the limits of human understanding and viewed pride with suspicion
  • Individualism was not considered a virtue

The Rise of Romanticism

The eighteenth century saw the emergence of romanticism, which brought with it:

  • Ideas of human goodness
  • Emphasis on the power of the individual
  • A shift towards Adam I traits

Post-World War II America

After the hardships of the Depression and World War II, American society experienced significant changes:

  • People were ready to relax and enjoy life
  • Consumption and mass advertising grew
  • There was a desire to break free from self-restraint
  • The 1950s and 1960s saw a focus on pride and empowerment
  • Marginalized communities sought justice and recognition

While these changes brought about positive developments in terms of civil rights and personal freedoms, they also contributed to the overshadowing of humility and the rise of individualism.

The Consequences of Our Self-Obsessed Society

Brooks argues that our current Adam I-dominated culture has had significant negative impacts on our lives and society as a whole.

Loss of Deeper Principles

By constantly chasing our desires and personal success, we've lost sight of more profound values and principles. This has led to:

  • A reduction of complex situations to simple cost-benefit analyses
  • A focus on climbing the social ladder rather than investing in relationships out of love or loyalty
  • An emphasis on how we achieve things rather than why we do them

Changes in Parenting and Education

The shift in societal values has affected how we raise and educate our children:

  • Parenting has become another tool for self-promotion
  • Children's achievements are seen as badges of honor for parents
  • There's less focus on developing well-rounded, balanced individuals
  • Education is geared towards resume-building rather than personal growth

Changing Priorities Among Young People

Brooks cites surveys of college freshmen to illustrate how priorities have shifted over time:

  • In 1977, 80% of incoming freshmen said they were seeking a meaningful philosophy of life
  • Today, less than 40% have this goal
  • In 1966, 42% of freshmen said wealth was an important life goal
  • By 1990, this number had increased to 74%

The Road to Character: Embracing Our Flaws

To counter the negative effects of our self-obsessed culture, Brooks suggests that we need to embrace the flaws inherent in all humans. This process involves several key steps:

Acknowledging Our Imperfections

By being honest about our flaws and shortcomings, we can:

  • Overcome self-centeredness
  • Embrace deeper social values like love and connection
  • Become more grateful for the affection and attention of others

Learning from Suffering

Brooks argues that experiencing suffering can be beneficial because it:

  • Makes us more grateful
  • Helps us realize that we don't deserve most of the love we receive
  • Encourages us to shift our focus from ourselves to others

The Example of Dorothy Day

Brooks uses the story of Dorothy Day to illustrate how acknowledging one's flaws can lead to personal growth and societal contribution:

  • Day struggled with alcoholism and depression
  • By admitting her flaws, she was able to refocus her life on helping others
  • She founded The Catholic Worker newspaper to aid people during the Depression
  • Her autobiography, The Long Loneliness, shared her journey from sadness to service

The Importance of External Support

On the road to character, Brooks emphasizes the need for external support to help us cope with our internal struggles. This support can come from various sources:

  • Family
  • Friends
  • Ancestors
  • Mentors
  • Religious faith

The Story of George Eliot

Brooks uses the example of writer Mary Anne Evans (pen name George Eliot) to illustrate the importance of external support:

  • Eliot was self-conscious, needy, and known for being "magnificently ugly"
  • She was emotionally weak and prone to unrequited love
  • Her partner, George Lewes, provided crucial support for her career and personal growth
  • With Lewes' help, Eliot was able to build confidence and overcome her insecurities

Overcoming Pride: The Key to Character

Brooks identifies pride as the central vice that prevents us from seeking help and growing as individuals. He argues that pride:

  • Makes us coldhearted and cruel
  • Deludes us into thinking we're the masters of our own lives
  • Pushes us to prove our superiority to others
  • Blocks us from receiving the aid we need to develop character

To truly grow and thrive, Brooks suggests that we must free ourselves from pride. By doing so, we can:

  • Embrace the assistance of others
  • Admit our own flaws
  • Begin balancing our internal Adam I and Adam II
  • Find happiness, fulfillment, and worthiness

Practical Steps Towards Character

While Brooks doesn't provide a step-by-step guide to building character, he offers several suggestions throughout the book that readers can apply to their own lives:

  1. Be honest about your flaws and imperfections
  2. Seek support from others, whether friends, family, or mentors
  3. Shift your focus from self-promotion to helping others
  4. Embrace suffering as an opportunity for growth and gratitude
  5. Question your motives when sharing on social media or seeking attention
  6. Strive for balance between your Adam I and Adam II traits
  7. Cultivate humility by recognizing your limitations and the contributions of others
  8. Invest in relationships and pursuits out of love and loyalty, not just for personal gain
  9. Reflect on the "why" behind your actions and achievements, not just the "how"
  10. Teach children the importance of character development, not just resume-building

The Broader Implications for Society

Brooks' ideas have implications not just for individuals, but for society as a whole. He suggests that by rebalancing our cultural values, we can create a more fulfilling and connected world:

  • A society that values humility alongside achievement
  • Educational systems that prioritize character development as much as academic success
  • Workplaces that recognize and reward moral qualities, not just productivity
  • Media that celebrates stories of personal growth and service, not just individual accomplishment
  • Political discourse that emphasizes shared values and common ground, rather than division and self-interest

Final Thoughts: The True Path to Joy and Fulfillment

In concluding "The Road to Character," Brooks reminds us that life's greatest joys are not found in material success or personal acclaim. Instead, true fulfillment comes from:

  • The moral battle of becoming a more loving, humble person
  • Connecting deeply with others and contributing to something greater than ourselves
  • Balancing our Adam I and Adam II traits to lead a rich, multifaceted life

By recognizing the limitations of our current self-obsessed culture and actively working to cultivate character, Brooks argues that we can find greater meaning, satisfaction, and joy in our lives. The road to character may be challenging, but it offers rewards that far outweigh the fleeting pleasures of self-promotion and worldly success.

As we navigate an increasingly complex and interconnected world, Brooks' message serves as a timely reminder of the enduring importance of character. By rekindling our appreciation for virtues like honesty, humility, and faithfulness, we can not only improve our own lives but also contribute to building a more compassionate and fulfilling society for all.

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