In her book "Wintering," Katherine May explores the concept of winter - both as a season and as a metaphor for challenging periods in our lives. She draws insights from nature, history, and personal experience to offer a fresh perspective on how to navigate difficult times.
Introduction
Life has its seasons, just like the natural world. We all go through periods that feel cold, dark, and seemingly endless - our personal winters. These could be triggered by illness, loss, failure, or any number of life's challenges. In "Wintering," May argues that instead of resisting these difficult times, we should learn to embrace them as necessary periods of rest, reflection, and renewal.
May's journey into the concept of wintering began with a series of personal crises. Her husband fell seriously ill, she was diagnosed with a chronic illness, and her young son was struggling at school. Forced to slow down and step back from her usual routines, May found herself drawn to the wisdom of winter in the natural world.
Through her exploration, May discovers that winter is not just a time of hardship, but also a time of great beauty, resilience, and transformation. By learning to "winter" effectively, we can emerge from our difficult periods stronger and more in tune with ourselves and the world around us.
The Inevitability of Winter
One of the key ideas May presents is that winter - both literal and metaphorical - is an inevitable part of life. Just as the seasons cycle through spring, summer, autumn, and winter, our lives too have their own rhythms of growth, abundance, decline, and dormancy.
In nature, winter is a time of retreat. Plants and animals conserve their energy, rest, and regenerate. Many creatures hibernate or enter states of torpor to survive the harsh conditions. Yet humans often resist this natural urge to slow down and regroup during difficult times.
May argues that this resistance is counterproductive. By trying to maintain our usual pace and productivity during our personal winters, we deny ourselves the opportunity to rest, heal, and prepare for the next phase of growth.
She writes: "Plants and animals don't fight the winter; they don't pretend it's not happening and attempt to carry on living the same lives they lived in the summer. They prepare. They adapt. They perform extraordinary acts of metamorphosis to get them through."
May encourages us to recognize our own winters when they arrive and to give ourselves permission to retreat and conserve our energy, just as nature does.
Preparing for Winter
Another important lesson May draws from nature is the importance of preparation. She introduces the Finnish concept of "talvitelat," which refers to the preparations Finns make ahead of winter. This could involve storing summer clothes, unpacking winter gear, chopping firewood, or preparing vehicles for icy conditions.
May suggests that we can apply this concept to our personal winters as well. While we can't always predict when difficult times will strike, we can cultivate habits and practices that make us more resilient when they do.
This preparation might involve:
- Building a support network of friends and family
- Developing coping strategies and self-care routines
- Creating a financial safety net
- Cultivating hobbies and interests outside of work
- Practicing mindfulness or meditation to build emotional resilience
May emphasizes that the goal of these preparations isn't to avoid winter entirely - that's impossible. Rather, it's to gather the resources we need to face it with greater strength and resilience.
Embracing Rest and Contemplation
One of the gifts of winter, May argues, is the invitation to rest and reflect. In our always-on, productivity-obsessed culture, we often resist the urge to slow down. But winter - both seasonal and metaphorical - offers us the perfect excuse to do just that.
May explores how our ancestors embraced longer periods of sleep and rest during the winter months. Before the advent of artificial lighting, people would often sleep in two shifts, with a period of wakefulness in between. This time, known as the "watch," was often used for reflection, prayer, or quiet conversation.
She suggests that by resisting winter's call to rest, we may be depriving ourselves of valuable opportunities for introspection and renewal. May encourages readers to give themselves permission to sleep more during winter, to spend time in quiet contemplation, and to resist the urge to fill every moment with activity.
This doesn't mean completely withdrawing from life, but rather finding a balance between activity and rest that aligns with the season - both in nature and in our personal lives.
The Power of Rituals
May explores how rituals and traditions can help us navigate the darker times in our lives. She looks at various winter solstice celebrations from different cultures, noting how they often focus on bringing light into the darkest time of the year and fostering a sense of community.
These rituals serve multiple purposes:
- They mark the passage of time, helping us to remember that winter (literal or metaphorical) is not endless.
- They bring people together, fostering a sense of community and shared experience.
- They provide comfort and familiarity during challenging times.
- They connect us to something larger than ourselves - be it nature, culture, or spirituality.
May encourages readers to create their own winter rituals, whether that's a regular winter walk, a special meal shared with friends, or a personal practice of reflection. These rituals can serve as anchors during difficult times, providing structure and meaning when other aspects of life feel chaotic or uncertain.
Reframing Our View of Winter
Throughout the book, May challenges us to reframe our view of winter - both the season and the concept. Instead of seeing it as a time of lack or hardship, she encourages us to recognize its unique beauty and gifts.
For example, she describes the joy of cold-water swimming, an activity that forces participants to be fully present in the moment and can lead to a sense of exhilaration and achievement. She also writes about the beauty of snow, which transforms familiar landscapes and invites even adults to play.
May argues that by changing our perspective on winter, we can find unexpected joys and opportunities for growth. This doesn't mean denying the challenges of difficult times, but rather finding ways to appreciate and learn from them.
Learning from Nature
May draws many lessons from how plants and animals cope with winter. She explores the hibernation patterns of various creatures, the way trees conserve energy during cold months, and how some plants require a period of cold to trigger their growth cycle.
One particularly interesting example is her exploration of how bees survive the winter. Honeybees work together to maintain the temperature of their hive, taking turns being "heater bees" to keep the colony warm. This cooperative effort ensures the survival of the entire hive.
May suggests that we can learn from these natural strategies:
- The importance of rest and conservation of energy during difficult times
- The value of community and mutual support
- The recognition that periods of dormancy are often necessary for future growth
She encourages readers to observe nature closely, particularly during winter, and to consider how these natural strategies might apply to their own lives.
The Myth of Constant Productivity
One of the key themes in "Wintering" is a critique of our society's obsession with constant productivity. May argues that this mindset is not only unrealistic but potentially harmful, as it denies the natural rhythms of life that include periods of rest and retreat.
She writes: "We're expected to produce at a grueling, constant pace, and stay logged-on even during our off hours. These slow activities can become a moving meditation that signals a time of slowing down and rest."
May suggests that by embracing winter - both literal and metaphorical - we give ourselves permission to step off the treadmill of constant productivity. This doesn't mean becoming unproductive, but rather recognizing that periods of rest and reflection are necessary for long-term creativity and productivity.
She encourages readers to resist the societal pressure to always be "on" and to recognize the value of fallow periods in their lives.
The Transformative Power of Winter
Throughout the book, May emphasizes that winter - while challenging - can also be a time of profound transformation. Just as many plants and animals undergo significant changes during winter to survive and prepare for spring, our personal winters can be opportunities for growth and change.
She writes: "Transformation is the business of winter... Winter is not the death of the life cycle, but its crucible."
May shares examples from nature, such as how some seeds require a period of cold (known as vernalization) before they can germinate, or how caterpillars transform into butterflies during their winter chrysalis stage.
She suggests that our own difficult periods can serve a similar function, forcing us to shed old habits or beliefs that no longer serve us and emerge renewed. This process isn't easy or comfortable, but it's often necessary for personal growth and development.
The Importance of Community
While much of "Wintering" focuses on personal experiences and introspection, May also emphasizes the importance of community during difficult times. She draws parallels to how many animals in nature survive winter through collective effort - like penguins huddling together for warmth or bees working together to maintain their hive's temperature.
May argues that humans, too, are inherently social creatures, and that connection with others is crucial for surviving our personal winters. This doesn't necessarily mean constant social interaction - which can be draining during difficult times - but rather having a support network to rely on when needed.
She encourages readers to cultivate relationships and community connections during good times, so they have support to draw on during challenging periods. This might involve joining clubs or groups, maintaining friendships, or participating in community events.
May also suggests that sharing our experiences of "wintering" with others can be powerful. It helps us realize we're not alone in our struggles and can provide mutual support and understanding.
Embracing the Cyclical Nature of Life
One of the most comforting aspects of May's philosophy is the recognition that winter - both literal and metaphorical - is not a permanent state. Just as the seasons cycle through the year, our personal winters will eventually give way to spring.
May writes: "We may never choose to winter, but we can choose how."
By embracing the cyclical nature of life, we can find hope during difficult times. We can remind ourselves that this too shall pass, and that the skills and resilience we develop during our winters will serve us well in the future.
This perspective also helps us appreciate the good times more fully, knowing that they too are temporary. It encourages us to live more mindfully, savoring each season of life for what it offers.
Practical Strategies for Wintering
Throughout the book, May offers various practical strategies for navigating personal winters:
Allow yourself to rest: Give yourself permission to sleep more, to say no to social engagements, to take time off work if possible.
Connect with nature: Spend time outdoors, even in cold weather. Observe how nature copes with winter.
Create cozy spaces: Make your home a comforting retreat with warm lighting, comfortable blankets, and soothing scents.
Engage in winter-specific activities: Try cold-water swimming, winter walks, or other activities that help you embrace the season.
Practice mindfulness: Use the quiet of winter as an opportunity for meditation or reflection.
Nurture your body: Focus on nourishing foods, gentle exercise, and self-care routines.
Seek professional help if needed: Don't hesitate to reach out to therapists or counselors during particularly difficult winters.
Create personal rituals: Develop your own traditions or practices to mark the passage of time and find meaning during difficult periods.
Connect with others: Share your experiences with trusted friends or join support groups.
Learn new skills: Use the indoor time of winter to develop new hobbies or skills.
Conclusion: The Wisdom of Wintering
In concluding "Wintering," May reinforces the idea that our personal winters, while challenging, are not just something to be endured. They are essential parts of our life cycle, offering opportunities for rest, reflection, and transformation.
She writes: "Wintering brings about some of the most profound and insightful moments of our human experience, and wisdom resides in those who have wintered."
By learning to winter well - to embrace rather than resist these difficult periods - we can emerge stronger, more resilient, and more in tune with ourselves and the world around us. We learn to trust in the cyclical nature of life, knowing that spring will come again, but also appreciating winter for its own unique gifts.
May's book is a comforting and insightful guide for anyone going through difficult times. It offers a new perspective on struggle and hardship, reframing these experiences as natural and potentially transformative parts of life. By looking to nature, embracing rest, fostering community, and developing personal rituals, we can learn not just to survive our winters, but to find meaning and growth within them.
"Wintering" is ultimately a hopeful book. It reminds us that even in our darkest times, we are part of something larger - the natural cycles of life that have persisted for millennia. By aligning ourselves with these rhythms rather than fighting against them, we can find peace, resilience, and even joy in the midst of our personal winters.
As May beautifully puts it: "Life meanders like a path through the woods. We have seasons when we flourish and seasons when the leaves fall from us, revealing our bare bones. Given time, they grow again."
Key Takeaways
Winter is inevitable: Both in nature and in life, periods of difficulty and dormancy are natural and necessary.
Preparation is key: Just as animals prepare for winter, we can build resilience and resources to help us through difficult times.
Rest is essential: Winter invites us to slow down, sleep more, and engage in quiet reflection.
Rituals provide comfort: Creating personal or communal rituals can help us navigate challenging periods.
Nature offers wisdom: By observing how plants and animals cope with winter, we can learn strategies for our own lives.
Community matters: Like many animals, humans benefit from mutual support during difficult times.
Productivity isn't everything: Our culture's obsession with constant productivity denies the natural rhythms of life.
Winter can be transformative: Difficult periods often lead to personal growth and positive change.
Life is cyclical: Remembering that winter always gives way to spring can provide hope during dark times.
Wintering is a skill: The more we practice navigating difficult periods, the better we become at it.
In essence, "Wintering" offers a paradigm shift in how we view difficult times. Instead of seeing them as failures or setbacks, May encourages us to recognize them as natural, necessary, and potentially transformative periods in our lives. By learning to "winter" effectively, we can not only survive our personal dark seasons but emerge from them with new strength, wisdom, and appreciation for life's cycles.
This book serves as a gentle reminder that it's okay to slow down, to retreat, to rest when life becomes challenging. It gives us permission to honor our need for renewal and offers practical strategies for finding comfort and meaning during our darkest times.
Moreover, "Wintering" encourages us to stay connected with the natural world, even (or especially) during difficult periods. By observing nature's rhythms and drawing parallels to our own lives, we can find comfort in the knowledge that we are part of something larger than ourselves.
Ultimately, May's book is a call to embrace all seasons of life - the flourishing summers and the barren winters alike. It's an invitation to trust in the cyclical nature of existence and to find beauty and meaning even in our most challenging moments.
As we navigate our own winters - whether they're brought on by personal loss, illness, failure, or global crises - the wisdom in "Wintering" can serve as a comforting companion and a practical guide. It reminds us that while we can't always control the seasons of our lives, we can choose how we respond to them. And in learning to winter well, we may just discover unexpected strengths and joys that we never knew we possessed.