Book cover of Change Proof by Adam Markel

Adam Markel

Change Proof

Reading time icon12 min readRating icon3.8 (33 ratings)

Resilience isn’t just about enduring difficulties but using them as opportunities to grow stronger.

1. Resilience Starts with Strategic Rest

Building resilience isn’t about brute force or stubbornly persevering through exhaustion. Instead, it involves planning for recovery before burnout becomes inevitable. Like the dogsled teams in Alaskan races, taking breaks before exhaustion hits ensures better performance over time.

Rest isn’t just slacking; it’s the cornerstone of effectiveness. Without allowing yourself moments to refuel, mental and physical systems reach their limits. When work mounts, stepping away can feel counterintuitive, but it’s vital for long-term sustainability. Strategic intervals replenishing energy and perspective enable better performance and decisions.

Taking care of yourself regularly builds resilience on every front. Intentional recovery fosters strength, allowing individuals to face challenges with a fresh mindset. When recovery becomes routine, it no longer feels indulgent but necessary—a tool for preventing fatigue and ensuring longevity.

Examples

  • Blair Braverman ensures her sled dogs rest well before they are overworked to preserve their stamina for long races.
  • Recovering with activities like yoga or journaling helps release stress hormones and recalibrate your thoughts.
  • “Forced” mini-breaks, like stepping away from your desk for five minutes every hour, refuel focus.

2. Ritualize Self-Care

Resilience thrives with consistent, small habits incorporated into daily life. Like brushing your teeth to prevent decay, weaving self-care rituals into routines creates a solid defense against burnout.

Ignoring your own needs because of busyness is not sustainable. Daily habits—be it exercising, meditating, or simply listening to music—reduce stress and bolster reserves of mental balance and physical energy. Small breaks and larger scheduled relaxation moments amplify endurance and diminish the risks of overexertion.

Integrating these rituals may feel unnatural at first but gradually becomes second nature. Prioritizing oneself not only secures one’s well-being but also enables people to show up fully for their work, relationships, and teams.

Examples

  • Ten minutes of deep breathing daily helps reduce stress.
  • Scheduling weekly hikes gives mental clarity and physical health a boost.
  • Family dinners act as a ritual of connection and renewal.

3. Rethink Your Internal Dialogue

The stories people tell themselves shape how they respond to stress and uncertainty. Negative thought patterns tend to spiral during challenges, but reframing them is essential for resilience.

Inner narratives often escalate situations unnecessarily, leading to reactions rooted in fear or avoidance. Replacing self-defeating thoughts with productive ones—like “I’ve faced worse before and succeeded”—can disarm panic and lead to better choices. Honest, constructive self-talk strengthens emotional stability, preventing spirals of negativity.

Approaching struggles as challenges rather than threats transforms perspective. This mental approach creates room for innovative problem-solving and confidence when navigating difficult experiences.

Examples

  • Catching yourself thinking, “I’ll never manage this,” and replacing it with, “This is hard, but I’ll figure it out.”
  • Using breathing exercises like the three-four technique to counteract moments of panic.
  • Writing down negative self-narratives and actively disputing their validity.

4. Combine Meditation with Physical Activity

Taking care of both mind and body builds groundwork for resilience. Practices such as meditation and exercise enhance emotional regulation, foster focus, and improve energy during adversity.

Meditation calms overactive thoughts and anchors your mind in the present. Even five minutes can help you feel centered. Meanwhile, exercise releases mood-enhancing endorphins while preparing your physical system to handle stress.

By committing to both mental and physical well-being, you develop a deeper reservoir of resilience. These habits provide visible rewards over time, improving both immediate coping mechanisms and long-term adaptability.

Examples

  • Meditating daily for ten minutes reduces emotional reactivity.
  • Regular jogging conditions the body while lowering anxiety levels from life’s challenges.
  • A clean, nutrient-rich diet nurtures both body and mind resilience.

5. Use the Pause, Ask, Choose Framework

When sudden disruptions occur, taking deliberate steps to respond guides the way forward. The Pause, Ask, Choose framework helps assess situations before charging ahead impulsively.

First, pausing recalibrates your emotional response, ensuring that stress doesn’t dictate your actions. Then asking thoughtful questions—like “What is in my control?” or “What can I learn from this?”—shifts focus from the problem to the potential solution. Finally, deliberate choice transforms you from reactor to decision-maker, setting actionable steps.

This model encourages confidence when navigating life’s unexpected challenges, replacing overwhelm with resourcefulness.

Examples

  • Counting to ten when receiving upsetting news activates rational thinking.
  • Breaking down disruptions into controllable versus uncontrollable factors helps clarify actionable steps.
  • Deciding to embrace change rather than resist it fosters adaptability.

6. Turn Setbacks into Learning Experiences

Challenges provide chances to examine weaknesses, adjust strategies, or uncover better paths forward. Viewing adversity through a lens of curiosity inspires growth.

Failures are natural crossroads in life; they are opportunities to redirect and refine goals if treated constructively. Shifting focus from what went wrong to what can be improved builds mental agility. Over time, this mindset trains people to see setbacks as stepping stones instead of barriers.

Overcoming struggles teaches lessons that make future challenges more manageable, creating cumulative strength to keep moving forward.

Examples

  • Reflecting after missing a promotion can highlight areas for professional growth.
  • Using past experiences of failure to mentor a team about perseverance and achieving goals.
  • Journaling after mistakes to extract observable insights for personal development.

7. Transparency Leads to Trust

Strong, resilient teams are transparent. Sharing decisions, challenges, and mistakes empowers collaboration and fosters bonds that help teams weather uncertainty.

When leaders admit errors, employees feel encouraged to act bravely. Transparency removes the stigma of failure and creates safe spaces for questions, suggestions, or innovation. Free-flowing communication unites people, ensuring collective effort and focus during turbulent times.

Teams with trust at their core perform with greater harmony, knowing honesty is valued at all levels.

Examples

  • Addressing team weaknesses openly during meetings encourages problem-solving.
  • Admitting as a leader that you’ve struggled too can break down barriers and make others feel heard.
  • Including team members early in planning invites collective solutions when faced with challenges.

8. Lead By Example with Self-Awareness

Resilient leadership begins inside. Self-aware leaders model what they expect and radiate clarity rooted in consistent values that others can rally around.

Understanding yourself—your beliefs, boundaries, and gaps—guides authenticity. Transparency about personal areas of growth builds credibility. When leaders show consistency between their actions and values, teams feel inspired and aligned.

Being the example of emotional regulation, disciplined pause, and meaningful recovery empowers teams to do the same.

Examples

  • Self-reflection after difficult decisions keeps leaders aligned with core values.
  • Taking regular breaks during meetings sets an example of prioritizing rest.
  • Acknowledging mistakes in the workplace inspires trust and openness among employees.

9. Community Inspires Resilience

Resilience grows out of connection. Creating a collaborative, empathetic environment inspires people to feel invested, supported, and purposeful during life’s twists.

When people work with shared goals or shared meaning, they are naturally more adaptive. Discovering purpose within work, coupled with camaraderie, fuels strength against external pressures. Celebrating wins together keeps collective morale high.

As a leader, ensuring people feel emotionally and intellectually safe deepens commitment and builds consistent resilience across teams.

Examples

  • Organizing team-building retreats fosters shared purpose beyond the day-to-day grind.
  • Recognizing individual and group efforts during weekly meetings inspires motivation.
  • Establishing purpose-driven goals tied to broader impact improves focus on the bigger picture.

Takeaways

  1. Schedule recovery breaks as non-negotiable parts of your day and week, regardless of workload pressures.
  2. Practice reframing mental narratives by disputing automatic negative beliefs and replacing them with empowering alternatives.
  3. Introduce the Pause, Ask, Choose framework in moments of stress to develop better, more thoughtful responses to challenges.

Books like Change Proof