"Who am I becoming?" This question shook John Mark Comer and helped him realize the toll that a life of constant hurry and busyness had taken on his health, relationships, and spirituality.
1. The damaging effects of busyness on life and faith
Busyness doesn't just fill your calendar; it drains your emotional and spiritual reserves. Comer discovered this firsthand while leading a thriving megachurch. Despite external success, he felt worn out and disconnected. His relentless schedule of meetings, sermons, and responsibilities left him short-tempered and distant from relationships and his faith.
Chasing external achievements often comes at the expense of internal peace. Comer worked six days a week, but the stress impacted his connection to his family and his congregation. His days blurred into an endless cycle of exhaustion and anxiety. He realized he had become a hollow version of himself, always moving but never truly living.
His choice to step back—leaving his church's leadership to pastor a smaller congregation in Portland—was the radical step he needed. This decision allowed him to find space for rest, reflection, and rediscovery. His new life emphasized emotional and spiritual health, showing how leaving busyness behind opens the door to real growth.
Examples
- Comer’s six-day work schedule put a strain on his relationships with colleagues and family.
- He found himself numbing out with late-night Kung Fu movies instead of engaging with his loved ones.
- His resignation led to an emotional crash, but also created space for healing and spiritual renewal.
2. Hurry ruins love and spirituality
Hurry sabotages what matters most in life: love, relationships, and faith. When we're rushed, our ability to show kindness, patience, and connection erodes. Comer argues that genuine love requires time, which hurry doesn’t allow.
The fast-paced culture we live in often makes it feel as though we’re always late and under pressure. In such states, the smallest inconvenience—like a family member taking too long to get ready—can trigger irritability or harsh words. Hurry creates a breeding ground for these unloving reactions.
Comer draws a contrast between our modern pace and the steady rhythm of Jesus's life. Jesus exemplified love through careful attention and presence, even when surrounded by demands. By slowing down, we can better embody love and faith in our daily lives.
Examples
- People often snap at loved ones when rushing to prepare for the day.
- Comer notes that Sunday, once a day of rest and spiritual focus, has morphed into another day of obligations.
- Jesus walked, rather than rushed, through life even when faced with emergencies.
3. Technology reshapes how we view time
Central to why we feel so hurried is the way technology has altered our relationship with time. Comer traces this transformation back to the invention of clocks, which imposed artificial rhythms on human life, disconnecting us from natural cycles like sunrise and sunset.
With the advent of Edison’s light bulb, humans started sleeping less, as there was no longer a natural end to the day. On average, people slept eleven hours a night before electric lighting; today, that figure has been reduced to seven hours. The introduction of smartphones further intensified the distraction and constant buzz of modern life.
While technology offers convenience, it also robs us of stillness. Comer suggests reclaiming our time by consciously deciding when and how to engage with technology, rather than letting it dictate our lives.
Examples
- People sleep significantly less than they did a century ago due to artificial lighting.
- The average iPhone user touches their phone over 2,600 times per day.
- The clock and subsequent technologies disconnected society from natural time cycles.
4. Accept human limitations to find balance
More time doesn't solve busyness—it only gives you more time to be busy. Comer explores the societal fear of missing out (FOMO) and how it drives people to overcommit, stretching themselves beyond their limits.
Instead of trying to do everything and be everything, Comer recommends narrowing your focus to what matters most. Human limitations, like personality and socioeconomic circumstances, define what is realistic to achieve in life. Trying to surpass them often leads to burnout, not success.
Accepting limitations is not defeat; it’s an empowering way to remove the pressure of overcommitment. It helps prioritize meaningful goals over endless distractions, making life more balanced.
Examples
- Comer highlights how some people burn out because they take on responsibilities that don’t align with their temperament or talents.
- A professional musician needs both practice and natural aptitude, showing that not every effort will lead to mastery.
- Limited resources may affect someone’s educational path, stressing how constraints shape life choices.
5. Follow the pace of Jesus's life
Jesus’s life was the opposite of hurried. Even in urgent situations, He moved deliberately and showed complete presence. Comer invites modern readers to examine Jesus’s practices—like withdrawing for solitude and spending unhurried moments with loved ones—as a guide for slowing down.
In a story from the Bible, Jesus paused mid-journey to heal a chronically ill woman, even though He was on His way to attend to a dying girl. This demonstrates how His attention never wavered, even when demands on His time were immense.
Emulating Jesus means prioritizing what's truly important rather than rushing from task to task. His ability to step away to recharge and live simply offers lessons that apply even in today’s world.
Examples
- Jesus took time for meals with friends, enjoying conversations that mattered.
- He often retreated to solitude, such as disappearing up a mountain to pray.
- He lived without rushing, handling crises with calm and care.
6. Embrace silence and solitude
In today’s always-connected world, silence often feels out of reach. Social media and constant notifications keep us perpetually engaged, leaving little room for thought or reflection. Comer emphasizes the need to carve out moments of solitude daily.
Jesus demonstrated the importance of alone time by rising early to pray or withdrawing to remote locations during busy periods. This quiet time was essential for His emotional and spiritual health, and it ensured He could meet the demands on Him effectively.
You don’t have to isolate yourself on a mountain to find solitude. Something as simple as sitting with a coffee in the morning or walking without headphones can create space to reconnect with yourself and your faith.
Examples
- Modern bus rides or waiting in line, which once allowed reflection, are now filled by scrolling apps.
- Comer recommends starting the day early for a moment of stillness before others wake.
- Jesus prayed through the night when overwhelmed, showing how solitude replenishes energy.
7. Reclaim the Sabbath for rest
Sabbath-long rest is vanishing in a society that prizes productivity above all. Comer argues for bringing back a weekly day of worship and relaxation to recharge and connect with loved ones.
Taking time off work and distractions lets you pause and appreciate life. Comer likens it to the pauses in music, which enhance the overall melody. Rest amplifies the meaning of what comes before and after it.
Rest doesn’t have to conform to traditional norms. Whether it’s walking in nature, cooking leisurely with loved ones, or attending a concert, resting in a meaningful way will refuel you for the week ahead.
Examples
- Comer recalls quieter Sundays when stores were closed, leaving time for leisure and reflection.
- People today often associate Sabbath rest with traditions, but Comer expands the idea to fit modern lifestyles.
- God Himself rested after six days of creation, modeling the need for recovery.
8. Reduce consumption to gain time
Modern consumerism adds unnecessary stress and robs people of time. Instead of buying what they truly need, many fill their lives with clutter, focusing on material possessions at the expense of relationships or personal growth.
Comer highlights the benefits of simplifying. Purchasing only what’s necessary frees up resources and time. Sharing possessions, like in car-share schemes, increases community ties while eliminating excess.
We’ve been sold the idea that happiness lies in having. Comer suggests rediscovering joy in simple, unpurchasable pleasures, like watching the sunrise or having coffee with friends.
Examples
- Early Americans bartered instead of consuming excessively, contrasting modern overconsumption.
- Participating in car shares reduces both costs and environmental impact.
- Choosing fewer clothes leaves more time for creativity and expression.
9. Live intentionally by slowing down
Life doesn't have to be a race. Comer recommends slowing down to add intentionality to your daily activities. You could practice driving at the speed limit or consciously engage with a cashier instead of texting while shopping.
Slowing your pace includes limiting your phone usage. By moving from a smartphone to a simpler device, for instance, you can reduce distractions while allowing deeper interactions with people and tasks.
Focusing on one activity at a time—such as carefully packing groceries or walking without rush—brings mindfulness to even mundane tasks, making them more enjoyable.
Examples
- Driving at the speed limit fosters a sense of calm and safety, rather than tension.
- Switching to a simpler phone declutters mental space.
- Mindfully packing groceries avoids stress and disorganization later.
Takeaways
- Put your phone away an hour before bed to calm your mind and improve sleep quality.
- Dedicate one full day a week to resting and reconnecting with loved ones, without obligations.
- Start your days with quiet reflection, even for 15 minutes, by drinking coffee or walking without distractions.