Book cover of Get Your Sh*t Together by Sarah Knight

Sarah Knight

Get Your Sh*t Together

Reading time icon9 min readRating icon3.6 (18,475 ratings)

Getting your life together doesn't require perfection—just realistic goals, daily progress, and a bit of commitment.

1. Start with Realistic Goals

Setting goals you can practically achieve is the first step toward building momentum in your life. Many people fail because they aim too high and fall short, leading to frustration and defeatism. Instead of setting yourself up for failure, focus on goals that suit your abilities and circumstances.

For example, rather than aiming to lose 50 pounds in a month, set a target to lose 5 pounds and create achievable weekly milestones. Building from smaller successes can lead to bigger, long-term wins. Realistic goals also help you stay consistent and motivated rather than overwhelmed by unrealistic expectations.

A practical exercise is to evaluate your current life and capacity before deciding what you want. What can you realistically commit to on a daily basis? When goals align with your schedule and energy levels, you are far more likely to keep going.

Examples

  • Aiming to lose a small amount of weight instead of achieving an idealized celebrity look.
  • Learning a skill 30 minutes daily instead of cramming an entire course in one week.
  • Decluttering one room at a time instead of your entire house in a weekend.

2. Time Management is Essential

Feeling like there’s never enough time stems from poor planning. Knowing how long basic tasks take and organizing them can free up time for things you value. Without planning, hours can disappear into unproductive activities.

Track how long it takes you to complete day-to-day tasks, like showering or cooking. Use this information to make a weekly schedule that includes time for personal goals or hobbies. Planning your time gives you control and reduces stress, making it easier to handle tasks that seemed overwhelming.

Ultimately, time management isn’t about sacrificing everything fun; it’s about striking a balance where you prioritize the things that matter most while staying organized.

Examples

  • Timing your workouts to create a predictable routine.
  • Blocking off specific time slots for family or personal development.
  • Delegating smaller chores effectively to save time.

3. Build Healthier Relationships with Friendly Rivalry

Keeping relationships alive often requires effort, and a little playful competition can make things fun and rewarding. Instead of complacently going through the motions, challenge yourself and your partner to show daily acts of love and thoughtfulness.

Try to surprise your partner regularly with small, thoughtful gestures. These don’t need to be over-the-top; keeping the fridge stocked with their favorite snacks or writing a kind note work just as well. Turning affection into a "who-can-top-who" game keeps things exciting and helps both partners feel loved and appreciated.

Remember, it’s often the little things, done consistently, that keep the relationship vibrant and strong, rather than just grand gestures.

Examples

  • Competing over who makes the best breakfast on weekends.
  • Remembering and celebrating small anniversaries or milestones with surprises.
  • Regularly showing affection by sharing small, thoughtful gifts or actions.

4. Embrace Confidence at Work

Exuding confidence at work isn’t about being perfect; it’s about appearing dependable, capable, and calm even when you don’t feel it. People trust and respect colleagues who project confidence, making it an essential skill.

Start small: wear clean, presentable clothes and maintain a cheerful demeanor. These simple acts can shift how others perceive you and raise your own confidence. Ask questions at work that show initiative, like what you need to do to earn a promotion. Direct conversations about goals open up opportunities and demonstrate your commitment.

Practice these steps, even if you’re faking it at first, and you’ll notice a change in how you’re treated—and how you feel about yourself.

Examples

  • Wearing neat attire to project a sense of professionalism.
  • Asking your boss directly what steps you need for a promotion.
  • Keeping a steady tone in meetings, even during challenging discussions.

5. Use Negative Thinking to Tackle Health Goals

Although positivity gets a lot of praise, sometimes harnessing negative emotions can motivate you better. Focusing on what you dislike about your current habits or lifestyle can push you toward healthier changes.

If you dislike your body shape but also hate exercising, compare which feeling outweighs the other. Often, short-term discomfort like exercise is preferable to long-term dissatisfaction. This way, negative thinking becomes a tool to push you into action rather than a trap of self-loathing.

The author shares how replacing punitive workouts with more gentle, sustainable habits—like light stretching—can still fit health goals while reducing stress.

Examples

  • Comparing your dislike for gym workouts with your dislike for your weight.
  • Substituting harsh diets with gradual calorie reductions.
  • Starting small, like opting for walks over intense cardio.

6. Face Anxiety or Let It Pass

When dealing with anxiety, you can address it head-on or let the moment settle and resolve itself. Choose your approach based on the situation.

For instance, if you’re stressed about a necessary conversation—like informing a roommate you’re moving—you may find relief only after addressing it. On the other hand, ambiguous or vague triggers, like an unclear email from your boss, might be better left alone until you gain clarity later.

The art lies in knowing whether the problem will dissolve on its own or whether action is unavoidable. This balance helps reduce unnecessary stress.

Examples

  • Having a tough conversation with a roommate to seek closure.
  • Taking a pause before replying to an unclear message.
  • Sleeping on a decision to see if new insights arise.

7. Keep a Tidy Home with Small Daily Efforts

Tackling a messy home feels overwhelming when you wait too long to start. Breaking cleaning into manageable chunks, like 20 minutes a day, keeps your space neat without sucking up entire weekends.

Begin with a single decluttering session to establish a baseline of tidiness, but don’t overdo it. From there, set daily or alternate-day tasks like folding laundry or taking out the trash. Spread these jobs out, turning them into bite-size, achievable goals.

Sticking to this method prevents a snowball effect where the mess gets out of control, making cleaning easier and less stressful.

Examples

  • Decluttering the living room in a one-time session.
  • Scheduling daily doses of cleaning, like putting toys away.
  • Tidying continuously to maintain a welcoming home.

8. Consistency Beats Perfection

Small, consistent progress often outlasts obsessive, all-out efforts that burn out quickly. Trying to tackle everything at once only creates stress. Instead, work steadily toward your goals: small steps every day keep you moving forward.

Even when motivation fades, the habits you build will carry you. You don’t have to do everything perfectly—missing a day or struggling once in a while is fine. Remember, it’s about progress, not perfection.

By breaking big tasks into simple, daily actions, you’ll eventually see success without it being overwhelming or draining.

Examples

  • Writing a paragraph each day rather than an entire book at once.
  • Making a simple meal plan instead of committing to an extreme diet.
  • Practicing light exercises regularly rather than unsustainable hard workouts.

9. Small Gestures Create Big Impacts

Personal interactions flourish when you prioritize small, meaningful gestures over infrequent grand acts. Whether in professional or personal settings, consistent kindness fosters trust and joy.

For instance, keeping a consistent streak of polite emails improves work relations more than sending one big thank-you email at the end of the year. The same goes for friendships or partnerships—regular little acts create stability and appreciation.

This “little and often” strategy applies beyond human relationships too—whether it’s health, home, or hobbies.

Examples

  • Sending quick "check-in" texts to friends occasionally.
  • Showing appreciation to coworkers frequently rather than during formal reviews.
  • Doing a small favor for your partner each morning.

Takeaways

  1. Break big tasks into small, daily actions to stay consistent without getting overwhelmed.
  2. Use both positive and negative motivation to push toward changes, particularly with health goals.
  3. Set aside 20 minutes a day for cleaning or personal development—little efforts add up over time.

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