How to Stay Sane

Sanity isn’t the absence of madness; it’s the ability to find balance and clarity even when the world feels like it’s spiraling out of control.

1. Emotion Drives Decision-Making

Humans like to think of themselves as logical beings, but their emotional right brain often outweighs their rational left brain in decision-making. The right brain, which develops early in life, forms through sensory and emotional experiences, shaping much of one’s personality. This is why we are more emotionally reactive and struggle to overcome feelings using reason.

The left brain, responsible for logic and language, develops later and often plays catch-up with the right brain. It creates post-rationalization, justifying emotional decisions with seemingly logical explanations. Research by neuroscientist Roger Sperry demonstrated this: participants would act on commands sent to their right brain but explain their actions with unrelated logic, genuinely believing their rationalizations.

Understanding this emotional dominance helps individuals be more mindful of how feelings influence actions. It’s a way of steering away from knee-jerk reactions during difficult moments.

Examples

• A toddler might grow up distrusting others if raised by unloving caregivers, as trust is rooted in emotional development.
• A person in an argument may emotionally lash out first and only later justify their rude behavior with logic.
• A study participant walked across a room when commanded by their right brain and retroactively explained it as needing a stretch.

2. Observe Yourself for Calm and Clarity

Remaining calm doesn’t mean suppressing emotions but observing them without judgment. Self-observation allows you to pause, evaluate, and respond thoughtfully rather than react instinctively.

For instance, when someone feels anger, observing and labeling it creates emotional distance, helping to de-escalate the intensity. Practices like journaling capture recurring emotional patterns, enabling you to recognize and address habits that hinder emotional health.

Focused attention techniques, like meditation and prayer, create mindfulness. By simply sitting still and focusing on your breath, you train yourself to notice thoughts without getting swept away by them. This practice sharpens awareness and helps in staying grounded.

Examples

• Journaling your day can bring patterns of stress or joy to light, fostering self-awareness.
• Observing your body while breathing during meditation can soothe anxiety and improve focus.
• Religious practices like prayer often incorporate routines that promote introspection and calm.

3. Relationships Reflect Your Emotional Growth

Human connection is vital for maintaining balance but requires self-awareness to thrive. People often project their past experiences onto others, which can disrupt relationships. For example, someone who faced abandonment as a child might struggle to trust new individuals.

Recognizing and adjusting self-sabotaging behaviors improves how you connect with others. Understanding your emotional triggers also builds empathy for others’ feelings, strengthening bonds. Nurturing trusting relationships can act as an emotional anchor during turbulent times.

Examples

• A woman who noticed unhealthy patterns in her past relationships—quick emotional attachment, fear of commitment—actively reworked those tendencies to build healthier connections.
• Opening up to a friend about your insecurities fosters deeper mutual understanding.
• Couples therapy often emphasizes shared acknowledgment of each individual’s emotions and past pains.

4. A Little Stress Can Be Good for You

Chronic stress can be harmful, but moderate stress, or "good stress," can challenge your brain and boost its health. Engaging in unfamiliar or slightly difficult tasks pushes the brain beyond its routine pathways, encouraging development and resilience.

Research shows that people who pursue lifelong learning stimulate their brains, helping to stave off cognitive decline. Adding controlled doses of new, slightly intimidating activities to your life is an effective way to stay sharp and boost self-confidence.

Examples

• Taking up a new hobby like learning a language keeps brain neurons active and growing.
• Challenging yourself to write a blog even if it intimidates you helps you build confidence.
• A study found that educated individuals who pursued varied interests lived longer and healthier lives.

5. Stories Shape Our Perspectives

Humans organize thoughts through narratives, which color interpretations of everything around them. Stories can be empowering, offering hope, or damaging, reinforcing biases and negativity.

This influence is evident in how people react to everyday situations. For instance, a man stranded with a flat tire might assume the mechanic will take advantage of him, due to past bad experiences, even if the mechanic is friendly. Understanding the power of narratives allows people to examine and rewrite their inner scripts for a more positive worldview.

Examples

• Fairy tales teach children that hardships have happy resolutions, reassuring them during troubling times.
• Negative past experiences might make someone overly distrustful of new acquaintances.
• Reframing setbacks as opportunities for growth lets you approach challenges with optimism.

6. Optimism Can Change Outcomes

Being optimistic doesn’t just improve your mental health; it can reshape your experiences. Seeing the world through a positive lens attracts goodwill and fosters better interpersonal connections. It also makes people more likely to persist through challenges.

For example, an artist facing repeated rejections reimagines each one as a stepping stone closer to success. This mindset encourages perseverance and ultimately leads to accomplishment. Cultivating positive thoughts can also enhance physical health and prolong life.

Examples

• Entering a social event with a smile invites conversation and connection, while entering with low expectations drives isolation.
• An optimistic athlete visualizing success is more likely to perform better.
• Studies found that optimists enjoy better mental and physical health, outliving pessimists by years.

7. Self-Observation Curbs Negative Patterns

Many struggles stem from repeating old, unconscious patterns of behavior. Reflecting on your thoughts and actions not only brings clarity but also gives you the power to change for the better.

By examining your responses to stressful triggers or past emotional reactions, you set the groundwork for personal growth. This discipline also helps you understand what truly drives your feelings.

Examples

• Identifying your fear of confrontation lets you approach arguments more constructively.
• Reflecting on a failed relationship might reveal patterns of complacency or avoidance.
• Writing down frustrations during heated moments helps prevent regrettable outbursts.

8. Push Beyond the Comfort Zone

Stepping into new challenges doesn’t require massive leaps; small, manageable risks can also foster growth. These measured steps rebuild confidence and prepare you for even larger endeavors.

For example, someone hesitant to speak in public may begin by speaking in front of a small, familiar group. Similarly, transitioning from journaling for yourself to sharing a blog publicly creates moderate stress that prompts growth without being overwhelming.

Examples

• Starting with a 10-minute workout builds confidence to take on hour-long fitness classes.
• Trying a new cuisine or cooking style broadens your comfort levels in subtle ways.
• Networking at small, welcoming events builds the confidence to mingle at larger conferences.

9. Rewrite Your Narrative

Changing your self-talk can lead to new perspectives, better emotional regulation, and empowered actions. Instead of dwelling on failures, look for ways to reinterpret them as setbacks or stepping stones for success.

By rewiring stories into ones that highlight your resilience and potential, you set yourself up for better long-term outcomes, ranging from personal happiness to professional success.

Examples

• Reimagining job rejections as practice interviews reduces discouragement.
• Reflecting on educational failures as moments of learning motivates continued pursuit.
• A successful entrepreneur might credit mistakes as essential lessons that eventually led to breakthroughs.

Takeaways

1. Practice self-observation by journaling daily; reflect on repetitive thoughts and work on changing harmful patterns.
2. Engage in one activity this week that gently nudges you out of your comfort zone. Start small but stay consistent.
3. Visualize positive outcomes every morning, and approach daily challenges with optimism to attract better experiences.