Confusion and fear can paralyze decision-making, but what if clarity begins with simply doing the next right thing?

1. Focus on the Present, Not the Outcome

Many decisions are clouded by fear of the future. Emily P. Freeman suggests a shift in perspective: focus on the present and do the next right thing. She recounts her dilemma when deciding to enroll in grad school—a choice that wasn’t tied to a specific goal but felt spiritually enriching.

When we obsess over future outcomes, we restrict our ability to act. Freeman points to the story of Jesus raising Jairus’s daughter and asking for something simple in return: make her lunch. This act demonstrates the importance of staying in the moment and focusing on immediate next steps.

Freeman ultimately enrolled in the grad program. She realized the decision wasn’t about certainty but about personal growth and faith. By fully immersing herself in this learning, she opened a path to deeper spiritual understanding without worrying incessantly about results.

Examples

  • The choice to enroll in grad school despite unclear long-term benefits.
  • Jesus’s simple instruction to make a meal after a miracle, bringing focus to the present.
  • Recognizing personal growth over guarantees of clarity.

2. Eliminate Noise to Connect with Yourself

Today’s endless notifications and distractions dilute our focus. Freeman emphasizes the concept of “soul minimalism”—removing distractions to hear inner truths. Shutting off unnecessary clutter fosters clearer thinking.

By disabling phone notifications, Freeman stopped “reacting” to the digital world and started focusing on her internal experiences. This made her present and reflective. For instance, while overwhelmed by plant choices in a garden shop, she re-centered herself by naming her fear, acknowledging it wasn’t her final decision, and moving forward.

Naming your emotions helps to diffuse their intensity. Whether it’s envy or fear, Freeman reminds us that such moments are fleeting parts of life’s bigger picture.

Examples

  • Turning off Instagram notifications to regain mental space.
  • Naming “fear” as the emotion behind her overwhelm in the garden center.
  • Viewing distractions as obstacles to self-reflection and decision clarity.

3. Look for Arrows, Not Answers

We often desire clear-cut answers, but Freeman believes life presents us with guiding arrows instead. These arrows don’t map out the entire road but point us toward the next step.

She shares her husband John’s struggle with a career decision. Overwhelmed by his job as a youth pastor and coping with his father’s death, he sought clarity but found uncertainty instead. A spiritual course in Colorado Springs unexpectedly offered him direction, pointing toward strengthening his marriage and leaning into his community.

This story shows that being honest about where you are—not where you wish to be—helps you recognize those guiding arrows. It’s about being present and flexible as life unfolds.

Examples

  • John discovers his next career move by attending a spiritual retreat.
  • Arrows come through unexpected people and situations when least expected.
  • Recognizing personal circumstances strengthens self-awareness for decisions.

4. Understand What You Desire

Sometimes decisions feel unclear because we don’t understand our true motivations. Freeman encourages digging deep into what energizes or depletes you and questioning whether your desires stem from love or fear.

She calls this exercise a “life energy list.” Reflect on recent activities to see what fuels you. Freeman felt a burst of joy from hosting a cookout, motivating her to plan similar events in the future. Conversely, she confronted fears about an overseas trip with Compassion International, realizing that love—not fear—should guide her choice.

Examining underlying drives can clarify choices and improve emotional resilience by addressing hidden sources of fear or frustration.

Examples

  • A cookout inspires Freeman to pursue more family gatherings.
  • Fear almost stops her from joining a charitable trip until a colleague reframes her thinking.
  • Reflecting on past three months to identify patterns of energy.

5. Stop Seeking Too Many Experts

During decision-making, the temptation to seek endless advice can lead to confusion. Freeman warns against collecting an abundance of gurus. She argues that clarity comes through co-listeners—people who genuinely listen and provide thoughtful dialogue.

She shares how she and her husband invited close friends to a small gathering to discuss his career change. Instead of offering solutions, these co-listeners provided support, prayers, and insights that opened unforeseen pathways.

Rather than hunting for answers from everywhere, surround yourself with trusted listeners who value your process over providing prescriptive advice.

Examples

  • Hosting listening-focused gatherings to share vulnerabilities.
  • Realizing an inbox cluttered with advice wasn’t helpful.
  • Muting overbearing influences, like artists or mentors, that provoke more stress than clarity.

6. Believe Your Believers

Criticism can sting but understanding its source changes how you respond. Freeman encourages listening to those who recognize and encourage your unique strengths—your believers.

A high school teacher’s compliments on her writing planted a seed that led Freeman to pivot careers years later. While constructive feedback is valuable, discerning who genuinely believes in you keeps negative voices from clouding your decisions.

Believers remind us of who we are at our core. Revisiting their positive words can reconnect us with parts of ourselves we might have forgotten.

Examples

  • A teacher’s praise for Freeman’s writing shaped her destiny as a writer.
  • Constructive feedback should come only from trusted, well-meaning sources.
  • Positive reinforcement strengthens identity and decision-making.

7. Welcome Surprises

Freeman suggests accepting uncertainty as part of life’s natural flow. Clarity often emerges unexpectedly when least expected. Trying to control every detail of the future robs us of openness needed for life’s surprises.

A chance encounter with singer Sarah Masen at a church lunch reminded Freeman how openness to the unknown often leads to joy. Masen’s song “Tuesday” had once deeply inspired her, and meeting her years later felt like a sign to embrace faith in unexpected blessings.

Rather than fixating on instant clarity, practice patience. Sometimes, surprises hold answers we couldn’t predict.

Examples

  • Serendipitous encounter with a personal idol reignites faith in openness.
  • Letting faith guide family home renovations despite delays in creative ideas.
  • Trusting time rather than forcing clarity to emerge.

8. Practice Slow, Intentional Living

Quick fixes might satisfy temporarily, but Freeman emphasizes the power of patience in decision-making. Rushing undermines the possibility of quieter, more thoughtful resolutions.

Freeman’s experience renovating her home underscores this concept. Although challenging decisions wore her down, gradual progress and faith over years brought her vision to life. Life’s beauty often lies in the slow unfolding of answers.

Developing patience provides inner peace, creating space for organic resolution rather than forcing decisions prematurely.

Examples

  • Waiting years for creative clarity on a home project.
  • Gradual faith-led decisions replacing compulsive choices.
  • Recognizing that time lends perspective to past challenges.

9. Let Go of Fear of Mistakes

Decision paralysis often emerges from fear of making a wrong choice. Freeman encourages focusing on present action rather than future consequences, trusting that mistakes are part of growth.

She recalls buying plants for her home, paralyzed with the fear of choosing the wrong ones. By reframing this as a small step rather than a defining choice, she overcame her hesitation. Knowing that adjustments are always possible lessens pressure and makes action accessible.

Viewing decisions as stepping-stones instead of endpoints removes fear and opens doors to new possibilities.

Examples

  • Buying small plants without fearing permanent mistakes.
  • Trusting trial and error during a partner’s career overhaul.
  • Remembering temporary decisions allow flexibility.

Takeaways

  1. Reduce distractions by simplifying your environment—turn off unnecessary notifications to create mental breathing room.
  2. Seek guidance from co-listeners rather than over-relying on experts. Invite trusted friends to help you reflect instead of demanding immediate answers.
  3. Accept that clarity often comes in unexpected ways. Remain open and curious rather than trying to control every outcome.

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