Wear It Well

Introduction

In her book "Wear It Well," fashion stylist Allison Bornstein shares her insights on how to transform your relationship with your wardrobe. Drawing from her decade-long experience in New York's fashion industry, Bornstein offers a fresh perspective on personal style, closet organization, and mindful shopping. The book aims to help readers discover their unique style, create a versatile wardrobe, and turn the act of getting dressed into a positive, self-affirming experience.

The Pandemic Revelation

The COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 provided Bornstein with a unique opportunity to observe how people interacted with their closets during lockdown. She noticed a widespread struggle among individuals to feel comfortable with their clothes and confident in their appearance. This realization led her to develop strategies that could help people view their closets as creative, expressive spaces rather than sources of anxiety.

Resetting Your Closet: The First Step to Style Freedom

Banishing Negative Self-Talk

Bornstein introduces a simple yet powerful exercise to help readers overcome negative thoughts about their bodies and closets:

1. Sit comfortably in front of your closet with paper and pen.
2. Take deep breaths to ground yourself.
3. Listen to your inner critic and write down all the negative thoughts.
4. Reflect on how these thoughts have impacted you.
5. Throw away the paper, symbolically discarding these limiting beliefs.

Tuning into Your Relationship with Clothes

The next step involves becoming more aware of what makes you feel good when you get dressed. Pay attention to:

• Styles that excite you
• Fabrics that feel comfortable
• Colors that lift your mood

This process helps reframe your closet as a supportive space full of possibilities rather than a source of stress.

Embracing Your Unique Self

Instead of chasing an idealized version of your appearance, Bornstein encourages readers to start loving their unique selves. This mindset shift is crucial for transforming your closet into a space that truly reflects who you are.

The AB Closet-Editing System

Bornstein introduces her systematic approach to closet organization:

1. Pull out your regulars: Identify the clothes you wear frequently without judgment.

2. Identify the never-worn items: Set aside everything you haven't worn recently.

3. Sort the never-worn clothes:

   • Pile One: Items to donate
   • Pile Two: Clothes to store (e.g., maternity wear)
   • Pile Three: Clothes you love but don't know how to style

4. Make emotional overrides: Keep pieces that spark creativity, even if they don't fit the above categories.

5. Organize your closet: Arrange your regulars and "how-to-style" piles by color or type for easy visibility. Do the same with accessories.

This system helps create a more manageable and inspiring wardrobe, setting the stage for self-expression through clothing.

Defining Your Personal Style

The Three-Word Method

Bornstein introduces a powerful technique to help readers define and refine their personal style:

1. First Word (Practical): Reflects your current comfort zone and regular wear.
2. Second Word (Aspirational): Describes your ideal future self and style goals.
3. Third Word (Emotional): Represents the feeling you want your clothes to evoke.

For example, Angela, a financial analyst who also enjoys cycling, chose "romantic," "sporty," and "elegant" as her three words. This combination helped her integrate her contrasting style preferences into a cohesive personal style.

Applying the Three-Word Method

The three words serve as anchor points for making style decisions. They guide you when adding new items to your wardrobe, ensuring that each piece brings joy and aligns with your personal style. Remember, not every outfit needs to incorporate all three words – the goal is to see their combined effect across your entire wardrobe.

The Nine Universal Pieces

Bornstein identifies nine foundational items that form the basis of a versatile wardrobe:

1. White T-shirt: A versatile base layer for various outfits.
2. Button-down shirt: Essential for quick outfit upgrades and layering.
3. Black turtleneck: A timeless, unobtrusive base layer.
4. Cozy sweater: Provides warmth and comfort, especially in office settings.
5. Blazer: Transforms casual looks into business-appropriate outfits.
6. Trench coat: A classic, chic option suitable for many occasions.
7. Good denim: Well-fitting jeans that can be a wardrobe staple for years.
8. Trousers: Essential for more formal or professional looks.
9. Belt: Helps create a flattering silhouette and completes outfits.

These pieces come in various styles and can be adapted to suit individual preferences and body types. The key is finding versions that make you feel comfortable and confident.

Overcoming Body Image Challenges

Bornstein addresses the common issue of body insecurities affecting clothing choices. She shares the story of Mary, who initially refused to try on certain clothes due to perceived flaws in her body. However, when Mary finally agreed to try on stylist-recommended items, she was surprised to find that they fit well and looked great.

The takeaway is that our perceptions of our bodies often don't align with reality, and these misperceptions can limit our style choices unnecessarily. Bornstein encourages readers to dress and accessorize for the person they see in the mirror today, rather than waiting for some idealized future version of themselves.

Creating Fashion Formulas

To simplify the process of putting together outfits, Bornstein introduces the concept of fashion formulas. These are tried-and-tested combinations of clothing items that work well together and suit your lifestyle. Here's how to create your own:

1. Start with your regular wear items as a base.
2. Experiment with different combinations and variations.
3. Document successful formulas by taking photos.
4. Use these formulas as a framework for quick and confident outfit selection.

For example, Gabrielle, a government employee who travels frequently, developed formulas like:

• Button-down + trousers + blazer + loafers
• Blouse + jeans
• Sweater + slim trousers
• Sweater + wide-leg trousers

These formulas allow for easy outfit planning and help identify gaps in your wardrobe.

Establishing a Daily Dressing Ritual

Bornstein emphasizes the importance of turning your daily dressing routine into a mindful, self-care practice. Here are her suggestions:

1. Allocate at least 20 minutes for getting dressed.
2. Create a dedicated space for dressing, filled with inspiring elements.
3. Set a calm, centered mood for starting your day.
4. Consider your entire day's activities when choosing your outfit.

By treating the act of getting dressed as a form of self-care, you set a positive tone for the day ahead.

The Benefits of a Well-Curated Wardrobe

Mode Switching

Clothes can serve as powerful cues for transitioning between different aspects of your life. For example, changing from work attire to comfortable home wear can signal the end of the workday and the beginning of relaxation time. This is particularly useful for those working from home, helping maintain a healthy work-life balance.

Personality Integration

The Three-Word Method helps incorporate various aspects of your personality into your wardrobe. This integration allows you to feel like yourself in different settings, including more casual modern workplaces.

Mindful Shopping

An organized closet and a clear understanding of your personal style lead to more intentional shopping habits. You'll be better equipped to identify what you need and resist impulse purchases, saving money and reducing environmental impact.

Authenticity and Confidence

When your wardrobe truly reflects who you are, you'll feel more authentic and confident in your daily life. This sense of being true to yourself can have a positive impact on various aspects of your personal and professional life.

Practical Tips for Wardrobe Management

Regular Closet Audits

Bornstein recommends conducting regular closet audits to keep your wardrobe fresh and aligned with your current style and needs. This involves:

1. Reviewing your clothes seasonally
2. Identifying items that no longer serve you
3. Donating or selling pieces you don't wear
4. Noting gaps in your wardrobe for future shopping

Mindful Shopping Strategies

To avoid accumulating clothes you don't wear, Bornstein suggests:

1. Shopping with a specific purpose or occasion in mind
2. Trying on clothes before purchasing when possible
3. Considering how new items will integrate with your existing wardrobe
4. Avoiding impulse purchases during sales

Caring for Your Clothes

Proper care can extend the life of your garments:

1. Follow care labels for washing and drying
2. Invest in quality hangers to maintain garment shape
3. Store seasonal items properly to prevent damage
4. Address repairs promptly to prevent further wear

Experimenting with Accessories

Accessories can dramatically change the look of an outfit without requiring a complete wardrobe overhaul. Bornstein encourages readers to:

1. Experiment with different jewelry styles
2. Try various scarf-tying techniques
3. Invest in a few statement belts
4. Play with different shoe styles to change the vibe of an outfit

Overcoming Common Style Challenges

Dressing for Changing Body Shapes

As bodies change due to factors like age, pregnancy, or weight fluctuations, Bornstein advises:

1. Focus on how clothes make you feel, not just how they look
2. Invest in a few key pieces that fit well and make you feel confident
3. Use accessories to adapt existing clothes to your changing body
4. Be patient and kind to yourself during transitions

Balancing Comfort and Style

For those prioritizing comfort, Bornstein suggests:

1. Look for stylish clothes in comfortable fabrics
2. Experiment with looser fits and flowing silhouettes
3. Invest in high-quality basics that feel good against the skin
4. Use accessories to elevate simple, comfortable outfits

Dressing for Multiple Roles

For individuals juggling various professional and personal roles, Bornstein recommends:

1. Creating a capsule wardrobe with versatile pieces
2. Mastering the art of layering for quick outfit changes
3. Keeping a few "transformer" pieces (e.g., a blazer) on hand
4. Using accessories to shift an outfit from casual to professional

The Psychology of Dressing Well

Bornstein delves into the psychological aspects of personal style:

Clothing as Self-Expression

Our clothes can be a powerful form of non-verbal communication, expressing our personality, mood, and values. Bornstein encourages readers to use their wardrobe as a creative outlet for self-expression.

The Confidence Boost

Wearing clothes that make you feel good can significantly boost your confidence. This increased self-assurance can positively impact various areas of your life, from professional performance to personal relationships.

Dressing for Emotional Well-being

Bornstein discusses how clothes can influence our mood and emotional state. She suggests having go-to outfits for different emotional needs, such as comfort clothes for stressful days or power outfits for important meetings.

The Role of Fashion in Self-Care

Viewing fashion as a form of self-care can transform the way we approach our wardrobes. Bornstein encourages readers to see dressing well as an act of self-love and respect.

Sustainable Fashion Practices

Recognizing the growing concern for environmental sustainability, Bornstein offers advice on making more eco-friendly fashion choices:

Quality Over Quantity

Invest in well-made, durable pieces that will last longer, reducing the need for frequent replacements.

Second-Hand and Vintage Shopping

Explore thrift stores, consignment shops, and vintage boutiques for unique, sustainable finds.

Clothing Swaps

Organize or participate in clothing swaps with friends or community groups to refresh your wardrobe without buying new items.

Renting for Special Occasions

Consider renting outfits for one-time events instead of purchasing clothes you'll rarely wear.

Supporting Ethical Brands

Research and support brands that prioritize ethical manufacturing and sustainable materials.

Adapting to Changing Fashion Trends

While personal style should take precedence over fleeting trends, Bornstein offers advice on staying current:

Selective Trend Adoption

Choose trends that align with your personal style and lifestyle, rather than trying to follow every new fashion.

Trend Interpretation

Find ways to incorporate trendy elements into your existing wardrobe without overhauling your entire style.

Timeless Foundation

Build your wardrobe around classic, timeless pieces, using trends as accents or accessories.

Fashion as Inspiration

Use fashion trends as inspiration for new ways to style your existing clothes, rather than feeling pressured to buy new items.

The Power of Color in Personal Style

Bornstein explores the impact of color on personal style and mood:

Understanding Your Color Palette

Identify colors that complement your skin tone and make you feel confident.

Color Psychology

Learn about the emotional associations of different colors and use this knowledge to your advantage.

Monochromatic Dressing

Experiment with monochromatic outfits for a sophisticated, put-together look.

Color Blocking

Try combining unexpected colors for bold, eye-catching outfits.

Dressing for Different Body Types

While Bornstein emphasizes feeling good over adhering to strict body type rules, she offers general guidelines:

Emphasizing Your Favorite Features

Use clothing to draw attention to the parts of your body you love most.

Creating Balance

Learn how to use clothing to create visual balance in your silhouette.

The Power of Tailoring

Invest in tailoring to ensure your clothes fit perfectly, regardless of your body type.

Challenging Body Type "Rules"

Don't be afraid to break traditional body type dressing rules if doing so makes you feel confident and comfortable.

The Role of Fashion in Personal Branding

For those interested in using fashion as part of their personal or professional brand, Bornstein suggests:

Consistency in Style

Develop a signature style that aligns with your personal or professional brand.

Dressing for Your Industry

Understand the dress codes and expectations of your industry, then find ways to incorporate your personal style within those parameters.

The Impact of Details

Pay attention to small details like accessories, grooming, and the condition of your clothes, as these can significantly impact your overall image.

Authenticity in Style

Ensure your style choices feel authentic to you, as this authenticity will come across in your personal brand.

Conclusion: Embracing Your Style Journey

Bornstein concludes by reminding readers that developing personal style is an ongoing journey. She encourages:

• Patience with yourself as you explore and refine your style
• Openness to evolution in your tastes and preferences
• Celebration of your unique style expression
• Viewing fashion as a fun, creative outlet rather than a source of stress

By following the strategies outlined in "Wear It Well," readers can transform their relationship with their wardrobe, boost their confidence, and express their authentic selves through their personal style. The book provides a comprehensive guide to not just dressing well, but feeling good in what you wear, making mindful choices, and using fashion as a positive force in your daily life.