Headscarves and Hymens Summary

"Why do they hate us?" Mona Eltahawy asks, shedding light on the painful and challenging reality of systemic oppression faced by Arab women in numerous societies.

1. A Culture of Misogyny Permeates Daily Life

Misogyny is rampant in many Arab countries, embedding itself deeply into culture through customs and laws. This discrimination stems in part from rigid interpretations of religion, particularly Islam, which empowers patriarchal norms. Women live in environments where daily control and inequality between genders are institutionalized.

Family courts rooted in Islamic laws often allow atrocities like child marriage, marital rape, and domestic violence. Instead of acting as protective institutions, these courts enforce unequal power dynamics. For instance, in Egypt, courts have permitted men to beat their wives "with good intentions."

The unequal status of women becomes tragically clear in horrifying events such as the case of an eight-year-old girl in Yemen who died of internal bleeding on her wedding night. Such practices highlight the lack of intervention to address gender-based violence and protect women's rights.

Examples

• Marital rape and child marriage are enabled by Islamic courts in multiple Arab regions.
• In Yemen, thousands stood by as clerics justified child marriage using religious references.
• Morocco ranks extremely low, at 129th out of 142 countries, in gender equality efforts according to global reports.

2. Silence Is Enforced Among Arab Women and Western Observers

Arab women endure pressure to stay silent to avoid bringing shame to their families and communities. Speaking out against oppressive norms often invites persecution and risks exposing entire communities to negative scrutiny by both internal and external forces.

This silence is compounded by Western liberals, who shy away from criticizing abuses against Arab women due to adherence to cultural relativism. Some see such oppression as internal to Arab societies and respect traditionally conservative practices, ignoring the human rights violations involved.

The courage to speak out is rare but commendable. Following the example of women in the US fighting sexism in marginalized communities, Arab feminists risk cultural backlash and physical harm to voice their demand for equality and justice.

Examples

• An Arab woman criticizing social norms may invite community shame, police scrutiny, or Islamophobic attacks from outsiders.
• Western liberals often push cultural relativism, avoiding direct criticism of misogynistic practices.
• The author chose to speak out despite risking accusations of betraying her culture or religion.

3. Veiling Is Often Not a Choice, Despite Its Personal Motivations

For many women in Arab societies, wearing headscarves such as the hijab or niqab signifies piety and adherence to religious traditions. Veiling may also be used as a protective measure to avoid sexual harassment or display modesty in a male-dominated culture. However, for most women, there is little to no real choice in the matter.

In Saudi Arabia, the morality police impose severe punishments on women who appear in public without a veil. Social stigma and familial shame compound this enforcement, leaving women little room for autonomy. The author recounts her difficulty in deciding to stop wearing the veil at age 25, a decision influenced by her privileged background.

Women who choose not to veil often face ostracization or worse. In many areas, veiling is a cultural mandate rather than optional attire.

Examples

• In Saudi Arabia, women risk imprisonment or lashes for failing to wear the veil appropriately.
• The author began wearing a veil to avoid harassment and later experienced societal backlash for removing it.
• Non-veiling Arab women are often accused of dishonor, putting their families at risk.

4. Virginity Control Leads to Dangerous Practices Like FGM

In many Arab cultures, a woman's virginity, symbolized by an intact hymen, is obsessively guarded, leading to the continued practice of female genital mutilation (FGM). Mothers subject their daughters to FGM to preserve their "purity" and family honor, often through harmful "ceremony" traditions.

FGM involves cutting female genitalia to suppress sexual desire, intending to ensure virginity until marriage. Despite its roots in cultural and not religious traditions, Muslim and Christian communities alike perpetuate the practice.

The damage caused by FGM is devastating. Victims face lifelong medical complications, psychological trauma, and, in some cases, death.

Examples

• Egyptian families subject daughters to FGM regardless of religion, though neither Islam nor Christianity endorses it.
• Some mothers encourage the practice by taking daughters to FGM "ceremonies."
• Victims report chronic pain and other severe health problems later in life.

5. Sexual Harassment and Physical Abuse Are Widespread

Arab women face high rates of harassment both publicly and within their homes. A 2013 survey in Egypt revealed that over 99 percent of women had experienced sexual harassment in public spaces.

Reporting harassment often results in further harm. Some women are forced to marry their rapists as a solution. Meanwhile, police abuse women further, conducting "virginity tests"—a form of assault disguised as a procedure.

Domestic spaces aren’t any safer. Islamic-based laws disproportionately protect men, enabling marital abuse without repercussions.

Examples

• In Egypt, police officers force detained women to undergo "virginity tests."
• Sharia law in Iraq allows reduced sentences for men who kill their wives.
• Abuse victims in Saudi Arabia are often forced into silence by religious authority.

6. Arab Feminism Finds Power in the Digital Age

The internet has become a powerful tool for Arab feminists to challenge injustices, connect with others, and fight for their rights. Activists like Wajeha al-Huwaider and Manal al-Sharif have used online platforms to defy societal norms and inspire change.

Saudi women, for example, have used online campaigns to advocate for rights such as driving restrictions. Videos posted by women breaking these rules gained widespread visibility, challenging gender restrictions and sparking global dialogues.

Social media continues to empower Arab feminists, providing tools to broadcast their voices beyond borders and challenge deep-seated systems of oppression.

Examples

• Wajeha al-Huwaider’s 2008 campaign to lift Saudi Arabia’s sports ban on women inspired legislative changes by 2012.
• Manal al-Sharif’s viral driving protest led to increased calls for lifting Saudi Arabia’s driving ban.
• Online platforms amplify struggles faced by Arab women, creating a sense of solidarity.

7. Arab Spring Protests Exposed Women to Violence

During the Arab Spring in 2010 and 2011, women joined revolutionary movements demanding political liberation, only to experience sexual violence from both authorities and fellow protesters. Syrian, Egyptian, and other Arab protesters reported rampant assaults during these mass demonstrations.

This exposed the hypocrisy of movements claiming to fight for freedom while perpetuating discriminatory abuses. Women’s rights activists stepped up to protect victims and call attention to these systemic issues.

Grassroots initiatives gained traction following cases of group violence, catalyzing deeper awareness of women’s struggles during political revolutions.

Examples

• A female protester was gang-raped during Egypt’s presidential inauguration in 2014.
• Syrian women involved in anti-Assad protests were reported to have been tortured and assaulted.
• NGOs such as HarassMap mobilized efforts to combat harassment in Egypt.

8. Change Begins With Equality, Including Sex Education

To address gender-based violence and inequality, societies must start with education. Teaching comprehensive sex education can help challenge the dominance of patriarchal laws and customs, such as forced marriages or tolerance for domestic abuse.

Empowering women with knowledge and engaging men in fair dialogue are key steps to tackling harmful norms. Positive change hinges on challenging the laws upheld by oppressive systems of governance.

Examples

• In Yemen, promoting sex education may counter policies that normalize child marriage.
• Public campaigns around the dangers of FGM spotlight the gap between custom and scientific reality.
• NGOs encourage open dialogue to reduce taboo surrounding sexual harassment.

9. The World Cannot Stay Silent Any Longer

The status of Arab women remains dire, but they won’t win this battle alone. International solidarity is necessary. Western nations and individuals need to stop justifying oppression in the name of cultural respect and instead take a stand for women’s human rights.

For many, advocating for women’s rights will require introspection and courage, but silence only ensures the survival of misogynistic institutions.

Supporting Arab women involves uniting in their voices, offering education, and amplifying anti-oppression dialogues beyond regional boundaries.

Examples

• Western liberals often err on the side of cultural relativism, neglecting issues of justice and equality.
• Global campaigns have proven to influence legislative changes, as seen in Saudi women’s driving protests.
• Increased media coverage brings awareness to the struggles faced daily by Arab women.

Takeaways

1. Amplify the voices of Arab women fighting for equality by sharing their stories with wider global audiences.
2. Advocate for comprehensive sex education and community programs aimed at reducing stigma and empowering women of all ages.
3. Challenge cultural relativism by critiquing societal norms that violate human rights, offering thoughtful and respectful solutions.