Book cover of Sex and the Citadel by Shereen El Feki

Sex and the Citadel

by Shereen El Feki

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Introduction

In "Sex and the Citadel," Shereen El Feki takes readers on a fascinating journey through the complex world of sexuality in Muslim societies. The book challenges common Western perceptions of the Muslim world as sexually repressive and explores the rich history of sexual liberation in Islamic cultures. El Feki delves into the current state of sexual attitudes and practices in Muslim countries, particularly focusing on Egypt, and examines the potential for a future sexual revolution in the region.

The Golden Age of Muslim Sexuality

A Sensual Past

Contrary to popular belief, the Muslim world was once a place of great sexual freedom and openness. In the mid-19th century, French author Gustave Flaubert traveled to Egypt and was amazed by the sexual liberation he encountered. He visited brothels along the Nile, enjoying music, dancing, and the company of both female and male prostitutes. Homosexuality was widely accepted, and sexual pleasure was celebrated openly.

This sexual freedom was not a new phenomenon but rather the tail end of a cultural peak that had begun in the 14th century. During this time, Muslim societies were known for their progressive attitudes towards sexuality, far surpassing the West in terms of openness and acceptance.

The Fall from Grace

The sexual liberation of the Muslim world came to an end during the 19th and 20th centuries, coinciding with the era of Western colonization. As Muslim societies faced military defeats and cultural domination by European powers, they began to experience what Egyptians call "uqdit al-khawaga" or "foreigner complex." This sense of inferiority reached its peak with the British occupation of Egypt in 1882.

In response to these losses, a cultural movement emerged that blamed the Muslim world's decline on its loose sexual morals and acceptance of homosexuality. This led to the founding of organizations like Egypt's Muslim Brotherhood in 1920, which advocated for a return to strict interpretations of Islamic law (sharia) as a means of restoring the greatness of Muslim societies.

The Current State of Muslim Sexuality

Sexual Repression and Its Consequences

Today, many Muslim countries, including Egypt and Saudi Arabia, are known for their sexually restrictive laws and cultural norms. This repression has led to widespread sexual dissatisfaction, particularly among women.

A 2006 study by gynecologist AM Elnashar revealed that 70 percent of married women in Egypt either suffered from sexual problems or were unhappy with their sex lives. Half of the reported issues were related to a lack of desire or inability to achieve orgasm, while a third of participants stated that intercourse was generally painful. Even more concerning, around 10 percent of married women reported being sexually abused by their husbands.

Breaking Taboos

Despite the prevailing culture of sexual repression, some brave individuals are working to break down taboos and improve sexual education in Muslim societies. In 2006, a groundbreaking talk show called "Kalam Kabiir" (Big Talk) began broadcasting in Egypt. Hosted by sex therapist Heba Kotb, the show openly discusses topics that are typically considered shameful or forbidden, such as internet pornography, oral sex, and wedding-night anxiety.

Kotb also runs a private counseling practice to help couples overcome sexual difficulties. She has found that many couples lack even basic knowledge of sexual anatomy, and most men don't know how to pleasure their wives. Perhaps most importantly, there is a severe lack of communication between partners when it comes to sexual matters.

The Virginity Obsession

One of the most pressing issues in Muslim sexuality is the intense pressure placed on women to remain virgins until marriage. This expectation has led to a booming business in virginity testing and certification in countries like Egypt. Young women are often required to obtain a certificate validating their virginity before they can marry.

The pressure to maintain an intact hymen has led some women to take drastic measures. Some turn to modern medicine, paying for procedures that create artificial hymens or stitch the vulva to simulate virginity. These procedures can be expensive, with some costing up to 2,000 Egyptian pounds – a significant portion of a middle-class family's monthly budget.

In 2009, the introduction of an artificial hymen product from Asia caused a minor crisis in Egypt. The product, essentially a tiny bag of red fluid that mimics the breaking of a hymen, was quickly banned from importation by the Egyptian Parliament.

Sexuality in Arab Media and Culture

Cinema and Censorship

While public displays of sexuality are rare in Muslim cultures, Arab cinema has historically been a space where sexual themes could be explored. Egypt, often considered the Hollywood of the Arab world, has a long tradition of incorporating sexuality into its films.

During the 1960s and 1970s, sex and sensuality were vital components of Egyptian filmmaking. Actresses like Yousra became sex symbols, starring in provocatively titled movies such as "Thousand Kisses and a Kiss" (1977).

However, in recent years, censorship has become increasingly strict, making it more difficult to portray sexual themes in Arab cinema. For example, the 2010 film "Ahasis," which deals with women's sexual frustration and extramarital affairs, faced significant censorship. The original version included several erotic scenes, but the final cut removed all frontal nudity, prolonged kisses, and overt references to sexual intercourse.

The rise of the Muslim Brotherhood following the 2011 uprising in Egypt has led to even more extreme censorship, with the promotion of a "clean cinema" movement. The most significant taboo in Arab cinema today is the juxtaposition of sexuality and religion. One film was shut down before completion simply because it featured a character running a prostitution ring while wearing a Muslim headscarf.

Temporary Marriages and Legalized Prostitution

In some Muslim societies, the concept of temporary marriage (zawaj misyaf) has become a loophole for legalized prostitution. Originally intended as a way to allow for sexual relationships outside of permanent marriage, temporary marriages have been co-opted in places like Cairo to facilitate sex work.

These brief unions are formed through a written contract signed before a witness, making it acceptable in the eyes of Islam for a man to engage in sexual activities with a woman for a short period. While not designed explicitly for prostitution, this is how temporary marriages are primarily used today.

The practice has become a way for desperate families to earn money by offering their daughters to wealthy men for short-term "marriages." For example, Samia, a young woman from a poor family, was sent to Cairo for a week-long temporary marriage in exchange for 20,000 Egyptian pounds – a significant sum that would support her family for several years.

Homosexuality in Muslim Societies

The Unspoken Taboo

Homosexuality remains a highly taboo subject in most Muslim societies, to the extent that many languages lack neutral or positive terms to describe LGBTQ+ identities. In Arabic, most terms used to describe different sexual orientations are derogatory or insulting.

For example, "khawal" is an insult used to describe a man who takes on the "male" role in a homosexual relationship, while "ilq" is a derogatory term for the "female" role. Younger generations have begun using the word "shadh" (pronounced "shaz") to refer to someone as a sexual deviant.

Some efforts have been made to introduce more neutral terms, such as "mithli" (masculine) and "mithliyya" (feminine), derived from the Arabic word for "same." However, mainstream Muslim society has been slow to adopt these terms.

Living Double Lives

The lack of acceptance for homosexuality in Muslim societies has led many LGBTQ+ individuals to lead double lives. Hisham, a gay man who has been married to a woman for fifteen years and has two children, maintains long-lasting sexual relationships with men in secret. He keeps his two worlds entirely separate, never revealing his sexuality to anyone and behaving differently with his family than with his male lovers.

Finding Freedom in Ambiguity

Interestingly, some members of the LGBTQ+ community find that the Muslim world's tendency to ignore or overlook sexuality can be beneficial. Anwar, an artist living in Cairo, appreciates that in Egypt, he can simply be seen as a male artist without his sexuality becoming a defining characteristic.

In contrast, Anwar feels that in Europe, he is often labeled and viewed primarily through the lens of his sexuality, which can be limiting for his art and personal identity.

The Potential for Change

Supporting Local Organizations

For those in the West who wish to promote positive change in Muslim societies' attitudes towards sexuality, one of the most effective approaches is to support local organizations already working towards sexual freedom and education.

Many independent groups within Muslim society are doing excellent work to promote sexual health, education, and rights. However, these organizations often struggle to secure funding from their own governments. Western donors can play a crucial role in supporting these efforts.

For example, following the 2011 uprising in Egypt, people in the United States donated $65 million to Egyptian charity organizations. This kind of financial support can go a long way in promoting democracy, free speech, and sexual education in Muslim countries.

Avoiding Western Impositions

It's important for Western supporters to recognize that Muslim societies don't need to adopt Western standards to make progress in sexual reform. Insisting on secularization or imposing Western values can be counterproductive and may alienate the very organizations working towards positive change.

For instance, some Western aid agencies have cut funding to civil organizations in Egypt following the rise of the Muslim Brotherhood, failing to recognize that many of these groups operate independently of government politics and continue to work for causes such as democracy, HIV prevention, and family planning.

Rediscovering Islamic Roots

History has shown that Islam itself is not inherently opposed to sexual liberation. The sexually progressive Muslim cultures of the 14th century serve as a reminder that Islamic societies have the potential to embrace more open attitudes towards sexuality.

As the push for reform continues, there is hope that Muslims will rediscover these historical roots and work towards a more sexually emancipated culture that is still in harmony with their religious beliefs.

Conclusion

"Sex and the Citadel" offers a nuanced and eye-opening exploration of sexuality in the Muslim world. Shereen El Feki challenges common misconceptions about Islamic attitudes towards sex and provides a historical context that reveals a much more complex picture than many Westerners might expect.

The book highlights the current challenges faced by Muslim societies in addressing sexual issues, from the pressure of virginity to the taboo of homosexuality. However, it also points to signs of progress and the potential for positive change in the future.

El Feki's work reminds us that sexual attitudes and practices are not fixed but are shaped by historical, cultural, and political forces. By understanding the rich and varied history of sexuality in Muslim cultures, we can better appreciate the complexities of the present and the possibilities for the future.

As Muslim societies continue to grapple with issues of sexual freedom and education, it is clear that change must come from within. Western support can be valuable, but it must be offered with respect for local cultures and an understanding of the unique challenges faced by each community.

Ultimately, "Sex and the Citadel" leaves readers with a sense of cautious optimism. While the path to sexual liberation in the Muslim world may be long and challenging, the seeds of change have been planted. As more people work to break down taboos, improve education, and advocate for sexual rights, there is hope for a future where Muslim societies can once again embrace a more open and positive attitude towards sexuality – one that is true to their cultural and religious heritage while also meeting the needs of modern life.

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